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I'm 13 y/o and consider myself mature enough to not be jealous of him. He was just born yesterday and i was more than excited throughout the whole pregnancy. I never thought I would be one of those siblings that got jealous of the baby. But, today I went to visit my mom in the hospital and anyone barely talked to me. I had stayed at home the night before and was sick with the cold, and no one had even asked me is i was feeling better. I feel so bad that I feel like this because I love my brother very much, but I can't help it. I even cried a little when I got home. And my step dad (they're divorced but he's still involved) was being so mean today (like always) and saying that i hated the baby. And I don't I love him very much. I'm more mad at my mom than I am at my brother. I don't mean to sound spoiled. Maybe I'm just used to being an only child?
MusicLuv2651 MusicLuv2651 18-21, F 12 Answers Feb 2, 2013 in Family Struggles

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Honestly, you're not going to be able to control your emotions to start. You will learn to love your baby brother because he's your brother. It's VERY hard suddenly getting a new family member, and having all the attention go away from you onto the new kid. <br />
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Since you can't control your emotions, control your behaviour. Be nice to your mom and the baby (your step-dad sounds like a jerk so forget him) and help your mom out when you can. She's going to have a VERY hard time ahead of her and if you can help, she'll appreciate it. It's also a good way to ensure you're appreciated and get some attention. <br />
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You'll learn to love your baby brother. There's no rule saying you have to think he's the best thing ever immediately when he shows up. Love takes time. Just do your best to be nice and supportive - even if you don't want to be. That's the mature thing to do here.

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I agree with this. Don't feel like you HAVE to love him with all your heart RIGHT NOW. Let it come naturally with the good times you have with him! Do that by making sure he has plenty of good times with his awesometastic big sister!

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Yeah, it happens. That baby will be needy as hell, and mom will definitely have to divide her attention up in a seemingly unfair way. But with that comes more privileges and responsibilities. Since mom won't be able to watch you all the time, you may get more time to hang out with friends. And, if you help with your new brother, you'll bond with him, your mom will REALLY appreciate it, and it's time that you can spend with your mom. Priorities do change with a baby around, and it doesn't mean your mom loves you any less.<br />
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If you still feel left out of conversations, put yourself in them! You're at the age where you can start having adult conversations with people, and it will make you very outgoing. It's good practice for when you go to bars and clubs, and it makes you seem very mature at your age. Congrats on the new brother! :D

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Yes, you are used to being an only child and what you're feeling is normal. Please don't feel badly about people paying more attention to the baby right now. That will end eventually. Right now, just be there for your Mom and try and take part in caring for your baby brother. That will help you feel closer to him and I promise, as soon as he starts crawling, he will be crawling to his big sister. Give him someone to look up to and trust. If you have any friends that have siblings younger than them,talk to them. See how they felt when their siblings were born. Everything will work itself out, I promise.

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...Think of it that you had a 13y/o head start, your baby brother could never have that, nor the unique bond that only you have with your parents... For your parents being the first born is always gonna be something extra special... No one could have that but you... Be a good sis you are the hero, the idol, the teacher for ever for in the eyes of your baby brother... =)

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Play with him kiss him love him shower him with attention, just like everyone else

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Aw it's only natural to feel that way. I used to be the centre of my older sister's world as I am the youngest child. I was everything to her, she used to bring me everywhere, spoil me rotten and I could tell her everything. But then she had her first child and everything changed. We're not as close as we used to be but she did give me the most amazing thing ever, my godchild, my niece :) I was jealous for ages as I wasn't the centre my sister's world but then after a while, things got easier. I began to accept my niece and how everything would be different from now on. I now have a beautiful niece who is now the centre of my world :) Things are tough for you at the moment, but trust me they will get easier :) Oh and congrats on becoming a big sister :D

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You'll get used to not having all the attention soon enough. Just don't dwell on the feeling, instead join the others in welcoming your baby brother to this world.

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thats the prob... being an only kid..my kids were your age when we had a surprise baby... haha.. they ALL still fight for his attention..:)

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oh ya :) you feeling like that... it will go away..:) they still love you the same:)

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