You can always start over; aren't we all constantly evolving? Today is tomorrow's past. As for forgetting the past, good luck...I can't help you there. My mom was verbally and emotionally abusive throughout my childhood. I was able to forgive her on her deathbed, thank God. But I can't forget, and it's been 10 years since she passed. The verbal put-downs reverberate in my ear as if I heard them yesterday. To this day, my self-esteem is effected, and if I haven't' been successfully in shutting it out by now, I supose I'll hear her heaping abuse on me til the day I die. So I could forgive, but couldn't forget.
i know its been over 4 yrs since you wrote this but its so much what i would have written had i answered this question and then i saw your screen name! I have this screenname on just about everything i have :) my cats and my dog keep me sane and from being suicidal sometimes. I wish those things my mother told me and said to me would just stop. sure i was made fun of and called names by other people but really i can forget those only remembering when something triggers it but those things mom said just won't stop. she's been dead 5 yrs now. anyway just had to share that and i hope you are managing and maybe by now have found a way to ease the emotional turmoil. good luck to you!
nobody will ever forget what happen in the past but to move on you need to look at it in different way that you can be who you are and start by accepting things that may hurts and overcome all the trial and shortcomings this way you will be happy person again and love what life is all about....
u need to forgot the past in start a new life. because past is past
You cant. And you shouldnt. The past sucks- take what you learnt from it to create a better you and a better present and future.<br />
I disagree. I have the ability to change- as I have and still is doing. The future is just what I want it to be. It hasnt happened yet so lighten up will you.
In regard to your last comment, your full of crap, I made a hell of a change in my life, yes it does color my future, but it is not the paint of which it is made. Get your head out of your self pity and decide to move forward, you can't change your past, ain't going to happen, but you can dang sure change your future. God did give us self determination, use it. The take Rolle's idea and put it to use, you don't have to write it down if you don't want to but stop seeing yourself as a failure, destined to continue your past, you are not unless you will it so.
Here's how they did it at AA:<br />
1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.<br />
2. We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.<br />
3. We each made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.<br />
4. We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.<br />
5. We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.<br />
6. We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.<br />
7. We humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.<br />
8. We made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. (There was a great Seinfeld episode about this step, when George felt the James Spader character had not sufficiently apologized for a cutting remark made at a party about the size of George's head)<br />
9. We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.<br />
10. We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.<br />
11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.<br />
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Im in the process of doing the same thing ~ I got no advice other then to be patient and act with only good intensions ~ "Some days I drop keys & some days I build cages." ~ One day @ a time" ~ Liv in the now ~ You cannot change the past and you cannot predict the future ~ Today's actions will either help build a positive 2morrow or destroy it ! ~ The choice is yours ~ Good luck ~ Luck has little 2 do with it, just a saying ~ Cheers ~
How we all wish we could develop amnesia at times! But we can't. And that's a good thing, though you don't realize it now. Your mistakes will shape you and guide you so that you will never, ever make them again, and you will become a stronger and better person in the future. The trick is learning to live with the pain of your past.<br />
Write a journal. Day One. Goals. What I want for myself is.....What I would like to achieve in life is......<br />
Then sit and think what you need to do and how you need to change your life to achieve your goals.<br />
In working for your goals and working toward something positive, the pain of your past will slowly fade, and you will gradually become what you want to be.
We all have something we find hard to move on from,but no matter how bad it is we have to be able to deal with the bad thats happened,try talking to some one ,close friend,write down all your pain on a sheet of paper then burn it,make a new start,it worked for me to do this,may sound funny but helped me.