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How do I tell my mother in law to clean her filthy room - she lives with my husband and I?

I don't want to offend her - but her room is getting filthier. I have waited for 2 days for her to clean out the dirty dishes that she has in her room and she still has not - I am ready to freak out on her. I don't want to offend her but she is lazy and spends all of her time online - she is 66 years old and does not have any friends her own age, she has been living with us since August 2012. Any suggestions or ideas would be great :)

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    Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):

    Tgilly - 51-55 years old - female

    Posted by Tgilly Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:23PM

    house rules apply to everyone...husband needs to speak to her.

    [ Reply ] | Like (5)

10 Answers to "How do I tell my mother in law to clean her filthy room - she lives with my husband and I?"

  1. FlowersNButterflies - 51-55 years old - female

    Posted by FlowersNButterflies Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:25PM

    I don't know that I would. She is obviously depressed. Just work with that and ask her for the dishes every night so it doesn't become a health problem. If she isn't showering, then that is a real sign, and she needs a family intervention to see a doctor.

    Like (2)

  2. NigelDoes - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by NigelDoes Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:25PM

    What the whiskered one wrote.

    Like (2)

  3. benetal - 70+ years old

    Posted by benetal Feb 8th, 2013 at 9:27PM

    BUy A Rat And slip it in there at night. Or......Discuss with your husband the need for her to get an apartment. He can discuss it with her whether serious or not and let her know the room is filthy.I would suggest not doing it yourself as you are really up set.

    Like (1)

  4. singwme - 56-60 years old - female

    Posted by singwme Feb 8th, 2013 at 9:11PM

    Correction--she lives with my husband and ME---objective case--(sorry --pet peeve)
    As for your problem--being that it's your house--tell her you have certain rules that you wish her to respect as you would if it was her house.

    Like (1)

  5. navyvet - 56-60 years old - male

    Posted by navyvet Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:50PM

    I would have a discussion with her son first. Explain how much this disgusting mess is offending you. And that it is not fair that the rest of the house is kept tidy which requires the efforts of everyone else. Your husband needs to step up & defend you, it is that simple.
    I have been taken into people's homes during some troublesome times in my past, & let me say that I kept my room neat, even though I was...well... a slob. It is a privilege for her to be living in your home, not a right. I know this fact first hand, believe me. Every home has certain established rules & all who dwell there must abide by them; regardless of their age.
    If the roles were reversed, would not she be talking directly to you concerning your room in her home? I believe so.
    Oh wait! Cut off her internet & tell her you had to use those funds in order to hire a maid to clean HER room! Just kidding!
    Sorry, just adding some levity. In short, something must be tactfully said to this woman; & honestly, this responsibility is not yours.

    Like (1)

  6. BeenSmiling - 31-35 years old - male

    Posted by BeenSmiling Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:46PM

    Do you have a dog? Start to gathering the dog's poo and throw it all around her room. Make sure to dilute it with a little water first for enhanced effect.

    Like (1)

  7. babyblue2013 - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by babyblue2013 Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:29PM

    why is she living with you? she needs her own space so are you.

    Like (1)

  8. purrface - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by purrface Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:27PM

    You shouldn't have to say anything to her. Her son should speak with her.

    Like (1)

  9. madhuratg - 31-35 years old

    Posted by madhuratg Feb 8th, 2013 at 8:27PM

    Since she is aged appoint some maid to attend her needs. IF it is not affordable Keep a big Waste Basket in her room and ask her to drop all the used dishes and other such things in that. So that at least the rest of the room can be clean. Once a day that basket can be changed.

    Like (1)

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