Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device
Once again a relationship has broken down. Once again I am the innocent party. I am aware of the grieving process but do not want to become bitter and twisted. How do I avoid this?
Nimbus007 Nimbus007 46-50, M 26 Answers Mar 11, 2010

Your Response

Cancel

One of many things I've learned about life is, when a relationship ends, there's almost never an innocent party.<br />
<br />
One way to avoid becoming bitter and jaded is to accept the fact that everyone makes mistakes, everyone gets it wrong from time to time, and that no one is entirely innocent.<br />
<br />
You forgive others because it's the right thing to do, and you hope they'll forgive you for the same reason.

Best Answer

Learn to accept that your loss is real<br />
Make it OK to feel the pain.<br />
Adjust to living without your girlfriend<br />
allow yourself to move on.<br />
And finally, what do you do with the love that you feel?<br />
Time will help heal your heart, your experience will hopefully help you within the next relationship. Depending on how long you were together healing could take up to a year or so! It really depends on how you feel inside... but tell yourself one day at a time and go out with friends, enjoy yourself, book a trip to go away and have fun with some people who really care...keep yourself motivated and busy, that will help you heal faster

Best Answer

It's hard not to if you feel you're the innocent party. Just be glad you found out what they were like and you didn't have children with them. Forgive any perceived wrongs (even if you don't tell them you forgive them.) Remember, if you carry a grudge, the only one you're hurting is yourself. Take care and surround yourself with friends, have a laugh and give yourself time.

Best Answer

Learn from the experience. I think that if we look at a failed relationship as a learning experience that we may be able to get past them. Do not focus on the whys and how comes. Dont try to see the bad things that may have caused the 2 of you to grow apart. When you start focusing on 'what did I do' , or 'what made her hate me' than you start to doubt your self. And that causes us totry to find all of the faults in the other person. Both of these things will undoubtably make any one bitter. So, instead we have to tell our selves that its all good. We gained a bit of knowledge from the relationship if nothing else. You are now closer to knowing what you can or cant tolerate in another person, you know of a few things that you probably shouldnt do or say, as well as some that work for you. You also will have learned a thing or two about the type of person to search for. Any failed relationship that you can learn by will create understanding inside you. When you finally find the perfect companion these experiences will have helped you to grow and so the right one, will be a very strong and powerful relationship. All you can do at this point and is smile and say live and learn. And know that there is something out there waiting for you that is more powerful than life itself.. its called TRUE LOVE. And its not easy to find. Pray that you dont find it before you are really ready.

Best Answer

No idea. I'm the same way myself. I am considering dedicating myself into becoming a right biatch.

Best Answer

That's a tough one. The first woman that broke my heart nearly destroyed me. It took me years to get over her and I had a hard time trusting the women I dated and kept them at a distance. I'm ashamed to admit that i broke up with several that got too close because I was afraid, and I wasn't very nice about it either. Then one day I looked around and realize that if I continued on the way I was going I'd spend the rest of my life unhappy, bitter and alone. So I started consciously working on letting my guard down, and eventually I was able to trust again.

Best Answer

I dont know. I am working on that myself

Best Answer

Love comes with hurt feelings . better to have love and lost then , never to have loved at all. <br />
If it was ment to be and you know inside what your missing or needing from the other person, that should tell you all you need to know. Time to move on and learn from this. A heavy heart will be lighter when someone new comes along

Best Answer

My Mothers Bitter and Jaded after 2 failed marriages......i'm so glad that my bad experiences have not done the same to me.....life is too short,i find that you have to look at the whole picture and tell yourself that you went into this,it happened and i have to try my best not to keep making the same mistakes in choosing the wrong partner.

Best Answer

Just accept the fact that you are just 2 different souls that cannot be together. Don't let anger build just concentrate on the thought (fact) that you are 2 different people.

Best Answer

google and look up on coping skills <br />
<br />
and study your past how you dealt with your past problems in an APPROPRIATE way...google coping skills and you decide for yourself the best method for you..mine has always been the religious coping method....<br />
<br />
best of luck to you..hugs

Best Answer

I just went through a breakup and concentrating on myself did wonders.. just immersed myself in so many hobbies and interests that the pain slowly left.. i still cant handle the thought of her being with another guy.. But that's easy to solve for me, i just don't put myself in a position of seeing that person until i can handle it..

Best Answer

A lobotomy.

Best Answer

I am currently going through a breakup myself....<br />
<br />
For me, I have focused on what the future may offer me, the new experiences that await me and the new goals I have set for myself. Further to that, I am learning about 'ME' in hopes that the next relationship will not involve a break up because the the stronger I am as an individual, the better I am in a team.

Best Answer

It can be hard it can be hard to trust your hart to another again but for me and ive been here many times it was fear then the trust that they are not like the last...so when ever i walk this road i tell myself not everyone is the same and prey that all will be ok...but u always hold back a little more every time...just be careful if the right one comes alone that you dont pass them by sweetie..im sorry you are going through this...hugs and kisses sweetie

Best Answer

sometimes it is impossible to avoid. I've dated after a break up and i got over the ex pretty fast. it is always good to be honest with the new person that your not interested in a relationship or etc.

Best Answer

Related Questions