How do you deal with a stepdaughter that you can't stand?

Posted 1 month ago

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artistaeli

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If she is a minor, remember that she is the child and you are the adult. Always act responsibly and kindly towards her. Communicate with her in a mature way. Tell her how her behavior makes you feel. Try to separate her from her behavior. Remember that she might be jealous of the relationship you have with her father. Assure her that you are not taking him away from her. Explain that you are not trying to replace her mother. 'You get back what you give'. If you are horrible to her, then you've got to expect her to retaliate. Tell her that you care about her and any advice you give her is in order to protect her. Explain things to her instead of just telling her off. You and her dad need to work together as a team and back each other up consistently when needed. Try to take an interest in her life. Arrange to do something she likes doing together, so that you can get to know each other better.

If she is an adult, learn to say what is bothering you assertively with the support of her father. If she has left home, then she really isn't your responsibility. Just be as pleasant as possible when you see her. People will soon see that she is the person causing trouble and not you.

Remember when you take on a partner, you also take on their children!

Posted 1 month ago

Other 11 Answers to How do you deal with a stepdaughter that you can't stand?

TiarnaEllen	Posted Sep 22nd, 2009 at 4:30AM If she's a child you need to try your best to like her. You were once a child youself. Treat her like you would like to be treated.. If she has behavioural problems, let her father deal with her.. Stay calm and patient and look out for, as you would most likely have done yourself as a child. It's maybe hard for her to accept that your her stepmum. Maybe she needs time to come to terms that she's got you in her life now. Good luck! :) xx Rated: +3Vote for this!
porkchopsandwich	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:52PM More info needed. Rated: +2Vote for this!
RandomBloke1973	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:52PM You need to realise that this girl is way more important to her father than you will ever be. That's his child. If she hates your guts, I honestly don't see how the marriage can work. Rated: +2Vote for this!
camael	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:52PM You must delve into why you can't stand her. Rated: +2Vote for this!
SummerWind18	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:08PM well, I am not in that situation. If I was, maybe I would avoid her? Or maybe I'd try to use psychology to change her. Or I'd talk to her dad and say, "it is worrying how your daughter____, this could have the consequences for her later of____, and she is not respecting me." But mostly, I guess avoid he? Rated: +1Vote for this!
ValhalaNot	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:09PM Well, erinware, I have a wood chipper and a dog that will eat anything! LOL Seriously, I feel ya! I have a stepson...whew Pray everyday for a speedy 18 year old birthday party and then give her a business card to the nearest Army recruiter! Rated: +1Vote for this!
sammylou4u	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:31PM Being a stepdaughter myself, i'd say give her more attention and money. lol Rated: +1Vote for this!
ScottyScorpio	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 4:56PM Scare the hell out of her EVERYDAY!! LOL. Rated: +1Vote for this!
stillgrieving	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 5:37PM look at why you don't like if she is still a child she could be scared that you are taking her daddy, you are an adult deal with it and don't expect her father to chose you will lose. children do and should come first. If she is an adult sit her down and hash out your differences, like two grown ups or leave. Rated: +1Vote for this!
ConanMan	Posted Sep 21st, 2009 at 11:38PM look if she's being a ***** it's probably to do with your nasty attitude to her. what do you mean you "can't stand her" get a grip. be an adult You have ONE choice. Suck up everything you percieve as negative, and absorb it. and reflect grace back as grace to her. Give her TIME. I don't mean wait I mean GIVE HER YOUR TIME. when your tired, giver her time anyway, I don't know how old she is but respect and time must come fro your soul . sounds to me you are living a paint-by-numbers life crossing the t's and dotting the i's and j's and you missed the point. you represent the demolition of that girls lifes and dreams. You have no choice. Suck it up. Throw back grace. And tell her you're weak if you're weak, tell her she's hurting you if she's hurting you. but never get angry never give her a dirty look, never subtly be cruel. there is never any excuse. and ffs learn to LIKE her Rated: +1Vote for this!
sh440	Posted Sep 22nd, 2009 at 12:15AM Is a stepdaughter the same thing as a step ladder? cackles clears throat Rated: +1Vote for this!

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