Post
Have been together 20 years married 17. Both of us have made mistakes. 5 years into the relationship I had a 1 night stand. 6 months ago he cheated with a coworker. Should also add that I had already caught him texting her 3 months earlier and that he said he ended it. He cheated while I was recovering from a surgery. I have forgiven him but do not seem able to find the trust. Neither of us has been truly happy for probably the last 5 years. I love him but do not believe I am in love with him. Do not know what to do.
confusedandisolated confusedandisolated 46-50, F 3 Answers May 4, 2010

Your Response

Cancel

Have you tried councilling? 20 years is hard to break but your not happy, your cheating and lying. You asking this question in the 1st place is a sign that it it should probaly be ended but I really recommend couples therapy 1st.

Best Answer

Now, i know about this stuff, am going thru it now and i married for nearly 20 long years unhappy many many years, i have 2 dependant children, and god i am getting out. he cheated 5 yrs ago twice almost a third and i can't wait to be living my own life away from him. I take totally what bliss407 is saying and know EXACTLY WHAT SHE MEANS. I have yet to meet my MR LEO (starsign!) I refuse to look back, loads of it is misery. I will look forward to being happy, and as each day goes i'm getting more independant, baby steps, but i'm doing it !



I am doing this for myself and my girls, i don't want them growing up thinking it's ok for a male (i won't call him a man - he's not) to be abusive and controlling.



My advice if you can't improve on what you have and know it's REALLY OVER then go for it, find your new life as i will do and do not look back. just be sure IT'S OVER.



Confusedandisolated, you don't need to be, just figure out what YOU WANT. Good Luck

Love Wish x

P.s. bliss407 gave excellent advice, it's that kind that helps to motivate.

Best Answer

Related Questions