How do you put the pieces back together?

You don't take it, because you've been single so long...Most likely, you saw your mother put up with way too much crap from a man....You maybe saw your father, being verbally abusive to your mom.....It's likely to be from your childhood.....that's why you choose men, who don't step up to the plate....and aren't good role models....

You need counseling...You don't deserve to be treated like that...your children deserve better childhood's than this....they can grow up to abuse their women....and have women "issues", because they saw you take it, and not stand up for yourself.....Children learn...what they live....

Get a support system....and start taking baby steps, to get you back....you've lost yourself somewhere in this mix....it's easy to do....if you're not paying close attention to YOU. Good luck.

You need to focus on you and your kids. The kids need a stable, loving home that they feel safe in. You need to get rid of those two so called "men" and take charge of your own life. Get up and get it done! Call upon your family and friends if you need to. Don't sit there and be abused and don't expose your children to it! Do you want them to think that it's okay to be treated that way?
You can do it! Even if you feel it will be difficult, just do it for your kids!

wow. tough question. the best i can say is be strong. things will get better.

A good cry.
Prayer for help and direction.
Stop self medicating with your favorite behavior/item
Assess whats left to use
Get help, if necessary
Realize you can only count on yourself 100%
Pick up the broom and do the next thing....(or go to work, or start pounding the pavement for that job-whatever the next thing is- and slowly the noise in your head from the pain will ease and you can think better...
AND you'll be that much further down the road.....
A WELL LIVED LIFE IS THE BEST REVENGE.....it helps those around you, it helps yourself, it helps the world by your not checking out.... bedouin

Start by believing you deserve better...and you do! From there, build up the courage to start fresh. A clean break,...move away if you have to. It's not good for your boys to see what you put up with. They need to see a strong feisty woman worthy of their respect and everyone elses. Stay away from men until you have launched your boys. If you find someone special, keep it special and don't marry or live together. Your boys should be your priority because they need you and they need you strong. In the end, if you can't do it for yourself, do it for you sons.

Posted Jul 3rd, 2009 at 10:45PM
you take it one day at a time

you look yourself in the mirror every day and say I can do this I deserve better I am strong

you repeat to yourself every chance that you want you children to grow up and know what a heath loving relationship is

don't be afraid to ask fro help

don't be to stubborn to except it when it is given to you

sign your boys up for things like Big brothers, boy scouts, YMCA, any place that can help you reinforce a positive male role.

and know you are not alone
many of us have been where you are and many of us have survived.

We will be here for you if you need
anything