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SADBOYSGIRL SADBOYSGIRL 18-21, F 9 Answers Feb 7, 2011

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LOL at being a better listener.<br />
Stop feeding men that crap because too many buy into it.We are NOT your girlfreinds,thats what they are for.<br />
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And the ones that take that "listen" crap to heart to early become just that your "Girlfreinds" OR they get dumped by women asking other women how to do it nicely without hurting his feelings.<br />
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And face it if you dont think you can hurt his feeling too much,then you dont want to dump him ,unless he is abusive and youve finally had enough.<br />
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Guys: unless your married to her or in a very serious relationship dont let her rope you into hearing about her crappy day too much or why she hates such and such. Instead smoothly take control of the conversation and lead it in the direction of something that makes her smile,laugh or feel good.<br />
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Women: stop trying telling the world you want a sensitive man.Becuase too many are starting to beleive it.We really dont want to hear your crap and are not your therapists.Think of all the guys that " really wanted to hear about it" or showed too much emotion....How many did you continue to date?..how many did you cheat on for the guy that didnt give a ****?...How many times did you think they were being fake and just trying to "win you over"?<br />
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Ofcourse, as I said earlier once the relationship begins to outlast the early " feel good, things are still new,lets screw like bunnys" stage,and begins to develope into something real..then we do want to listen a little more...but unitl that point we dont,and believe it or not i really dont care,you dont want us too either.<br />
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And to answer your question "Anonhoarder was right about being honest.<br />
Tell him everything he did wrong..be downright brutal about it but not in a bitchy way.Give him a chance to see things through your eyes so he can reflect on your words and decide wich ones have merit,and then work on improving himself ba<x>sed on that.<br />
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Dont worry about hurting his feelings...they will be hurt..just dont be a ***** about it,but dont beat around the bush either.If you wish to soften the blow tell him the things you still like about him.Be honest dont make **** up.Avoid words like "sweet" and "nice"...those words are poison to all but the most naive of men.

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"This just doesn't seem to be working for me, I'd like to go back to just being friends"<br />
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Actually... He'll still be hurt and you probably won't end up as friends, but at least you'll have told him.

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Theres no "without hurting him". If you don't want to be with him anymore, the kindest thing you can do is end it. End it with compassion, tell him you are sorry, you just don't feel that way anymore and walk away, It's all you can do.

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As much as I hate to say it, there isn't any easy way to tell someone this without hurting his feelings -- not unless you're simply delivering the coup de grace since it's clear to you that he's already lost interest (which seems unlikely to be the case). It's obvious that you still care about him on some level -- if you didn't, it wouldn't matter to you whether you hurt his feelings or not. However, no matter how considerate you might try to be when you break the news to him, there's a very good chance that his feelings will be hurt and there's not a lot that you can do about it. If you're not breaking up with him because of anything to do with his behavior, then do your best to emphasize the fact that your decision is in no way a reflection on him.

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Let him know you want to get rid/drop/lose/remove of the "boy" but keep the "friend". It's a lighter way of letting him down gently. You'd say something like this "How would you feel if i wanted to drop the boy and and keep/just remain friends?" The question will somewhat confuse him which is what you want. he'll say like "What?? What do you mean??" Then you recap your feelings and how you have gotten to this point letting him know that you want to remain friends. If you use the direct approach they usually get mad. I have used this before and its always worked for me.

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