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IamDRock IamDRock 31-35, M 11 Answers Feb 8, 2013 in Alcoholism

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I dont know, it attacks me before I have a chance.

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Call the police!

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Theyd just laugh at me :(

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Very carefully... ;-) I usually have my sandwiches on a french roll with lots in them, so I need to slice them in two, and navigate them with both hands, otherwise, it can get pretty sloppy.

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So I need to go to France? I only have one hand I can't find the other one

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No you don't need to go to France. Luckily, we've got our own version of the French Roll. Can't say how accurate it is though. And if you can't find the other hand, then be forewarned, part of your sandwich may end up in your lap, or on the floor for the dogs. ;-)

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Dogs eat cats don't they? Why would they eat a sandwich? Should I make a cat sandwich? Will you help me find my hand?

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lol I've seen dogs chase cats up a tree, but I've never seen them actually catch one... Dogs will eat anything they see fall to the floor, once it's there, it's theirs, or at least that's what they think....You know I'd help you find your hand, are you sure you're not sitting on it?

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You are so wise... Please teach me these things... My hand might be in the sink

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if it is in the sink, you'd better grasp it before it goes down the drain! Oh, and be sure to wash it before you wrap it around that sandwich, you never know for sure where it's been!

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Oh I know where it's been and that's why it was soaking in the sink. That hand has a dirty mind of its own!

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numbers don't eat.

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What about letters?

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Depends on the health of the eater and the sandwich.

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I just had several heart attacks and strokes

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Is it a bacon sandwich or tomato sandwich? Also, how many of your teeth are left and what infections or damage is present in your stomach?

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It's bacons cheese and eggs. 2 teeth are left and my stomach is missing

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Put the sandwich in a blender, liquify it with some whole milk and heated lard. Pour the mixture into your feeding tube quickly and liberally mixed with a lot of scotch whiskey. Tell the IRS to go f___ themselves and say your goodbyes to anyone you care about.

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So I should put my tax return in the blender, call the IRS and tell him I love him and drink some cold lard?

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There is no should. Just have a weapon handy if you don't like jail.

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What if I like jail?

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Then the world is your oyster.

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Dammit. Just overloaded my sarcasm meter. *orders new batch of meters*

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Amen

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The sandwich eats you.

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I better run

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Left to right

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Should I read a book too?

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If you like, as long as you're turning your head in that direction

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With their mouth.

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Is that near my elbow?

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No, near your azzhole.

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Thanks

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No problem.

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