You have to know where you went wrong first. Discover why this happened or why the action took place, understand why you did it and move on from there. Learning from your mistakes is the best way to heal. Then you must forgive yourself because you cannot completely blame yourself, for you only did what you thought was right.
reflect on what you did
reflect on do you regret doing it
............. or do you regret getting found out
accept your true share of responsibility
.................... no shirking it
then accept it as a mistake that you will not repeat.
i wont all happen overnight
................ and if it is really stuck
....................... talk it through with someone that you trust
........................... or meet a therapist
.............................. i did both
finally forgave myself
............... lots of effort involved
................. tears and anger
....................but well worth it to be free of feeling bad.
good wishes to you
and my respect, from robbie
i hope it helps. robbie
It really depends upon your outlook on life. Forgiveness is necessary only if there is a problem. Here are 3 paths to a solution of the underlying problem.
1) If you are your own God (creator and sustainer of who you think you are), then you only have your own resources with which to work. Of course, everything the mortal person knows was learned from interface with the current world system; therefore, there are many different philosophic and religious solutions available within the present world system. Notice I am not condemning this route to the solution. The desire to feel better is a good motivator to find the right fit to solve your problem.
2) If you believe that God is creating your reality, then it is important to know something about your God. My God is very compassionate and understanding. My God is not offended by the way I handle or mishandle my dilemmas, but is ready to take advantage of the situation to heal the hurt in my spirit and protect me from myself in the future. My God lets me know it is He that does this for me because it makes Him happy to do so. Thus if you are like that in some substantial way, then application for a solution will reveal a solution, and the solution is custom tailored to you and your circumstances. In other words, ask God for a solution. My God is very pragmatic, and wants to quickly solve this distraction so He can get on with His plan for my life. There is a lot to be learned as this situation is resolved.
3) Lastly, remembering that your are but mortal and recognizing that you will make mistakes is the first step in a pragmatic method of self healing. The pragmatist does not seek to inflict additional damage, but seeks a solution that works for them. Be willing to accept your weaknesses and failures and determine not to do it again to avoid additional turmoil in your own spirit. Seek peace so you can help others feel better and more peaceful too. This brings a reward of bliss that encourages you to keep on this path.
Summary: Realizing that you need to fix something is evidence that you already have started the procedure back to harmony. Before the disturbance that made you seek forgiveness, there was a semblance of harmony. Remember that harmony tends to restore itself if you allow it to be so. Thus here are three distinct ways to a solution. One must realize that there is not a one size fits all solution. Be flexible. Be merciful to yourself so you will be merciful to others. Self forgiveness enables you to more easily forgive others and thereby maintain your harmony.
By taking drugs
Whatever one did not to mull over it all the time and miss out on life. Get on with life, live today.
By making a solemn vow to learn and Grow.