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How many people here value marriage?

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    vvonderwoman - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by vvonderwoman Nov 5th, 2012 at 9:57AM

    I Do, married 6 years now to a beautiful man, but celebrating the 10 year anniversary of the day I met my husband today. Growing up with the generation I am from, our parents all, seemed at/around the same time started a messed up trend to go thru like a mid-life crisis and divorced around the same time "wanting something better out of life" for themselves, now their parents, with exception of few were more opt to stay together till death. You know what that did, other than make people not of their word? It showed the rest of us bad examples of How a marriage does not work. We lost sight of what good ones looked like.
    I knew at a young age, I wanted the romance, the old fashioned courting, to know before I ever said an I do, I knew I would be sure of it and I took it serious, I mean this commitment is for life, a promise you are making. Marriage is so sacred, sharing a life with someone, having a pure one of a kind bond that no one else has that you get to, you make the promises, and you keep them!
    I don't care who you are, there are always tell tell signs that someone is not right for you way before it gets to that point of wanting to marry someone, so many just ignore that because they love the thought of being in love, they do not want to be alone or what someone does for them, which to me is very selfish, at times I feel to care more about my spouse then I ever do myself and he does the same for me, or so that’s how I have been experiencing it. I was proposed marriage to by 3 men and said no 3 times before I even met my husband, it came down to I knew I wasn't "in love" with them. I could never fake it, as now a days you can see ones that do. Hence the reality TV show marriages ;)
    If you want to know more, pay attention to the marriages that work, ones You see people happy in, with social media reporting and the emphasis on just who is marrying who and the divorces, how often have you ever seen a couple celebrated for the long ones? rarely ever.
    I tell you all this because it effects my heart to see anyone lose hope in the sanctity of marriage. Take the time, especially when your young to get to know yourself, love yourself first, if you don't, then how in the world can you expect anyone else to? We all deserve it, a valuable marriage.

    [ Reply ] | Like (3)

30 Answers to "How many people here value marriage?"

  1. BATOVN - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by BATOVN Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:08AM

    I DO!!....been married for 23 plus years......you just gotta work at it and commit to it

    Like (3)

  2. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:12AM

    awww.. :') Just gave me hope marriage still works. thank you. hope people would be like you.. having the creative fidelity.

    Like (1)

  3. Lushiro - 18-21 years old - male

    Posted by Lushiro Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:04AM

    LMFAO
    Marriage is a joke.

    Like (3)

  4. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:05AM

    so sad.. I guess marriage is not that important naymore

    Like (1)

  5. Lushiro - male

    Reply by Lushiro Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:06AM

    Nope. Least not to me.

    Like (1)

    4 more replies
  6. BeeHappy83 - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by BeeHappy83 Nov 25th, 2012 at 2:44AM

    *Raises Hand* I do

    Like (2)

  7. darlene34b - 31-35 years old - female

    Posted by darlene34b Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:59AM

    I always thought that marriage was a good thing when I was a little girl. Now though, I don't value it as much. If 2 people love each other, then why would you need to be married?

    Like (2)

  8. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:05PM

    well.. because they need grace from God. and that's where sex will show up. I don't know how to explain it. I didn't grow up in a liberated country, but I believe marriage is such a important because two people took an oath. a pledge. a promise that should never be broken. divorce is the number one enemy of preserving a good marriage..

    Like (1)

  9. darlene34b - 31-35 years old - female

    Reply by darlene34b Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:09PM

    if you don't get married, then there is no danger of a divorce. Also, what about same sex couples?

    Like (1)

    1 more reply
  10. EarthlingWise - 41-45 years old

    Posted by EarthlingWise Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:43AM

    It's the quality of the relationship that matters, not the public status.

    Like (2)

  11. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:47AM

    I don't know. FOR ME, it's very important. and it's sacred. it's just the modernized world swept away it's importance..

    Like (1)

  12. EarthlingWise - 41-45 years old

    Reply by EarthlingWise Nov 1st, 2012 at 1:22PM

    Life is bigger than words.

    Like (1)

  13. DragonsAreReal - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by DragonsAreReal Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:14AM

    Yes. I'm LDS, or Mormon. Marriage is something that I've been taught is sacred and important because in our religion it isn't "Til death do us part", but "For Time and all eternity" if you are married in the temple. This makes the choice of who and when you are married much more important and significant.

    Like (2)

  14. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:16AM

    wow. your oath is better than the til death do us part :) and me too.. I treat marriage as sacred

    Like (1)

  15. laughingsoul - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by laughingsoul Mar 13th, 2013 at 7:40PM

    I value marriage. It is the best school, teaches you at first how to give, than how to understand, forgive, and compromise. It may open minds and hearts. I value especially the unhappy marriages, imo those could be ones to open the minds and hearts. By being very happy we may keep inside the circle, focus on its warm and cozy interior contemplating the walls. Yet unhappiness I guess could give a soul pushes to question to do searches for new universe, not for a lover but something deeper, wider ... It may be the road for creativity where singers makes wonderful songs painters are creating movements and colors, books takes form... Or volunteer work may rise, awareness .... It is very hard for a husband or a wife to fulfill each other for a life time... Marriage nowdays may also be a reason for the government and churches to keep control of the couples and their children. The married couple is forced to struggle to provide a roof, food, education for the children. Of course from there "must have" consumerism could also reach the ceiling so here is how marriage can be only a reason to fill the pockets of some who value money and assets over everything....

    Like (1)

  16. uklad007 - 22-25 years old - male

    Posted by uklad007 Mar 7th, 2013 at 8:30AM

    ,ariage is good if only couples r not cheating.

    Like (1)

  17. boonroonru - 41-45 years old - female

    Posted by boonroonru Feb 18th, 2013 at 1:31AM

    I do. It's something that is supposed to last, but so many people write it off. "Oh, this marriage isn't working out, guess I'll get a divorce." Shake the kids up, they will get over it. Who cares, right?

    Like (1)

  18. rowenbumble - 56-60 years old - female

    Posted by rowenbumble Jan 21st, 2013 at 11:52AM

    It is a valued thing. Unique in its doing correctly.

    Like (1)

  19. GodsLovedMan - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by GodsLovedMan Nov 2nd, 2012 at 10:00PM

    I value marriage, but it hasn't been very good to me in general. Four of them broken, now. *sigh*

    Like (1)

  20. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 3rd, 2012 at 12:07AM

    oh. :(

    Like (1)

  21. GodsLovedMan - 41-45 years old - male

    Reply by GodsLovedMan Nov 3rd, 2012 at 5:33AM

    Yeah. So that's what my situation has given me. I think marriage is supposed to be great- but for me it really isn't so great....:-/

    Like (1)

  22. cuddlybear - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by cuddlybear Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:37PM

    I do

    Like (1)

  23. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:41PM

    lol. sounds like getting married

    Like (1)

  24. cuddlybear - 26-30 years old - male

    Reply by cuddlybear Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:43PM

    As soon as I find the right girl

    Like (1)

    3 more replies
  25. FoggyKoala - 18-21 years old - male

    Posted by FoggyKoala Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:16PM

    For me, it is mostly for appearances. People can love each other, and be perfectly happy with each other, but to gain that social acceptance they get married. They don't get any benefit from it, maybe some financial things, but I am not that familiar with the details. In the end, I think marriage isn't for the people getting married as much as it is for their families. Of course, it is also a promise to be together, but that means very little, if I consider the divorce rates.

    Mostly it is about "HEY, I am in the marriage club now!"

    I am not saying that I will never get married, I am just saying that it won't happen soon.

    Like (1)

  26. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:23PM

    ha ha. nice one. yes, social acceptance. but I don't acknowledge any material thing though. but, you had your point. good luck

    Like (1)

  27. BrighterThantheSun - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by BrighterThantheSun Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:10PM

    Depends on what values one attaches to marriage. I value mine for the goals we achieved together, the responsibilities we have shared, the friendship and the love.

    It's not perfect, mine is on shaky ground right now because I think our priorities and goals have shifted apart. People say marriages fail, but I won't ever say mine did. I value it for the accomplishments and where we have gotten together in life.

    Like (1)

  28. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:25PM

    keep holding. soon problems or conflicts would be over like it never happen. :) I think. well I'm not yet married, but I'm happy there are people who brings hope to me that someday, when I'm at the right age for marriage, it's still valued as before. thanks. :)

    Like (1)

  29. coloco - 61-65 years old - male

    Posted by coloco Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:49AM

    Good for us, not sure what the problem is with these sad sacks. Personal view is, they are the same people who keep making poor choices.

    Like (1)

  30. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:52AM

    ha ha. agree. although not to be mean, but they need to realize.. there's more to marriage than papers. hmm.

    Like (1)

  31. coloco - male

    Reply by coloco Nov 1st, 2012 at 12:02PM

    Yep, we are both pig headed, opinionated, strong willed and darn hard to deal with at times. We do get a good laugh at ourselves at times, and I have no problem with saying I'm sorry, my fault or not if i think it is needed, and I have noticed the same of her. Its not easy to merge two lives and make it livable for both and still allow for growth, but it has to be done or you quit.

    Like (1)

    3 more replies
  32. ACuriousStudent - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by ACuriousStudent Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:37AM

    I value strong, healthy, mutually beneficial relationships. Marriage can be this but is too often not. Marriage can make ones life easier though because it is so widely accepted and recognized by society, intuitions and the government. These means they have a preset way if interacting with you and your spouce and are not required to think, which can be a good thing.

    Like (1)

  33. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:39AM

    legal, that's what you mean. both in law and the eyes of many people. :) good point.

    Like (1)

  34. DreamsOfAureus - 22-25 years old

    Posted by DreamsOfAureus Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:24AM

    I believe in marriage. I don't think very many other people do. It requires a lot of factors and variables that are hard to measure. Many people aren't willing to make personal sacrifices, and once they do, what else will be compromised? Individualism? Self fulfillment? You have to be willing to have two identities. One that is you and them. One that is only half of you. How do you choose?

    Like (1)

  35. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:30AM

    you're right about having two identities. I think you should extend your patience and you gotta control your temper and lower your pride..

    Like (1)

  36. DreamsOfAureus - 22-25 years old

    Reply by DreamsOfAureus Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:58AM

    I don't have to do any of that. I am not married. For that reason. I don't know that I could give myself up. What is wrong with wanting to reach your full potential, instead of slowing or stopping it before you get there. Shouldn't your partner have the best of you?

    Like (1)

    2 more replies
  37. TBlank20 - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by TBlank20 Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:23AM

    I do. People today just don't care about anything. If they have to work to achieve something, they don't want it. They don't want to commit to anything. That's why people hate marriage today. Plus, society's morals are just f*cked up anyway. It's like a car. You can buy the car and have it as your own, or you can just rent it. I'd rather own the car, thank you very much. When the time is right of course. Think out your decision.

    Like (1)

  38. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:31AM

    thanks. :) I go your point. many people don't care about marriage anymore. they just get married, then divorce then married then divorce.. just what about that?

    Like (1)

  39. TBlank20 - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by TBlank20 Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:35AM

    Yeah. And many divorce for stupid reasons. Granted many get married for stupid reasons too, like unwanted pregnancy. You have to think and make decisions before hand. Hard decisions.

    Like (1)

    1 more reply
  40. tezza333 - 66-70 years old - male

    Posted by tezza333 Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:20AM

    I value marriage highly, ours has lasted over 50 years, we've been through tough times & good times, always together & helping each other. For us it's not a religious commitment in any way, it's a loving partnership to be treasured. It's give & take, working together, open discussions, being thoughtful & pleasing each other. Don't knock it, make it work & it's so rewarding!

    Like (1)

  41. Amandra - 18-21 years old - female

    Reply by Amandra Nov 1st, 2012 at 11:25AM

    :') I salute you sir. wow.. 50 years. *speechless* hope I could be married to a guy like you

    Like (1)

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