WTF?? Your husband must have come out of the dark ages, just beyond the time when men pulled the women around by their hair and painted themselves blue! No doubt about it your in an abusive relationship. You need to leave this guy and divorce him quick! Else your lining yourself up for more trouble down the line.
Get away, get a divorce, and get the police involved if necessary. Threats of violence like that are never acceptable, and it is NOT his place to tell you where you can and cannot go, EVER.
It is a terrible double standard. You are an adult human, you can go where you please, when you please. (Unless it's a military base or something, I wouldn't recommend that ;) )
Time for you to leave.
Last time I need permission to do something is when I was a child. You're not helping yourself by letting him do this to you.
He is not your keeper ?? Permission ?? PUHLEEZE - file your papers or don't... but leave him, now
It's a red flag for either spouse to require permission from the other to have friends and relationships. Yes, there should be some common courtesy so the other doesn't need to worry, but asking permission is ridiculous. If you asked any therapist about it, one spouse controlling who the other spouse is allowed to see and when is a textbook trademark of abusive relationships. All abusers demand that those they abuse are kept isolated. It cuts off nearly all ability to create or maintain strong relationships and forces their dependence on the abuser. That ensures the abused is kept in the dark as to how bad they really have it, that they don't have anyone to help them get out even if they knew, and that their friends can't see how bad it really is...
What level of abuse it is, I cannot guess, and will not try; but refusing to allow you to see friends in 4 years is abuse in and of itself. It screams that he sees you more as property than as a partner and an equal. Also, regardless of how annoyed he is with you, he never has any right to threaten your life (it's actually illegal), especially about something so menial; that is also emotional abuse... And by doing these things proved by that, that he does not trust, respect, or value you as a human, only a possession. He is not acting in your best interest, he doesn't care about you or what your best interest is, he only cares about himself how well you serve him. It doesn't matter how many nice things he says to you when you're "being good" it's all manipulation, not respect, and certainly not love.
The best thing you can do is have him arrested (for threatening your life), stay with a friend (DO NOT LET HIM KNOW WHICH ONE), and get a divorce (DO NOT BACK DOWN). I don't know you, but I can tell you this: you deserve far better than him...
It is called domestic violence. Get professional help.
Your husband is a sociopath. Seduce him, invite him to a hot bath and while you are soaking cut his manhood off.
"I spit on your grave" style, nice!
Okay that really happened, this very patient woman just got tired one day and she did that. However, even though I would personally want to take revenge like that for men who hv hurt me and changed me I cant really do that. All I can suggest is you get away from him and stay away. People dont change. My experience tells me that men lie to get you back but they show their true colours again. So get a divorce and stay away from him if you like your life.
Be very careful if you really mean it, the recording bit that is. It will prove to be very useful as evidence of the torture you are going through. Never let someone treat you like that.
Also, till this deadline do not retaliate.
That's exactly what I am talking about. If you get caught more abuse will follow. Be extra careful, if you have a friend who can help share this with her, it makes these things easier when you have someone to support you..
You are in control of your life. Stop feeling like this.. I am telling you this from experience because I have been through something similar. I would be so happy one day and think my life is changing for the better and the next day something happens and I find myself crying like somebody played a cruel joke on me. The only way to deal with this is to never be too comfortable, just remember that life is unpredictable and cruel. When you feel like things are getting better and you feel happy just enjoy that moment. And never let your happiness be controlled by someone else..
was your friend male or female?
stand your ground!!! or kick him!! hahaha
I came from a home of domestic violence. Feel free to stay around and get treated like a doormat. The first step is to isolate you from your friends so you feel alone and can't tell anyone anything. Have fun love. Seems super mature to allow someone to treat you like that.
First step is talking openly saying you are your person, you will see your friends when you want and be in control of your own life. If he disagrees, he's not worth keeping and in the end will only cause pain and heart ache.
Get in your car and drive as far away as possible and start fresh.