I've been struggling with that myself this last yr. At times I don't ever want to see or talk to him again because I'm so mad that he didn't want us as much as I did.
Other times I ache for him so bad that it feels like I'd do anything to hear his voice just once more. That was a really bad feeling in the beginning.
Friends told me to get someone new and I finally thought I was ready - but it didn't work... I kept comparing this guy to my ex and the ex won. Hands down.
Now it's been a yr and I want so much to stop hurting. I've at least decided not to have another relationship until I'm sure I won't bring this one with my ex with me.
I know about not normal - I felt crazed. We broke up for a reason - why am I now dying to get back with him? I asked myself that a lot to start with. All I knew was I missed everything good about him and all the good times that were no longer going to happen... that's the toughest part to accept. Oh, and I concentrated on the fact that I said I'd always love him and would always be there for him, and realized he never said that back to me. And he loved me most before we did anything intimate. It got to the point that afterwards - he was a jerk again.
So go back and look at any emails, IM's, anything that you can read conversations you had. Go back as far as you can. Start to realize how angry you both had gotten, or how silly your arguments were- over nothing! That helps a bit. Its hard to remember the bad times - all I could see were the great things about us, so examine the bad. What can you learn from those times that you can resolve and not bring to your next relationship. Pour your feelings out on paper. Put his name at the top, or a friends name, write it all down - then don't send it to anyone - put it in an envelope with a date 6 mos to a yr away - then read it again The difference in how you feel across time will amaze you.
Good luck darlin' I know it's not easy. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and cry when you need too - it clears out your sinuses
,,, and here's the honest truth, I will always love him and if he ever needed me, I'd be there. I have no idea if that will ever change. Many hugs.
I'm trying to get over someone too. Just take it one step at a time, try not to think about them too much. Don't get into a new relationship right away, it's not fair to anyone if you're only thinking about your ex during the whole relationship. Find something to do that makes you happy. Good luck.
care about someone else that deserves your care
2 years have already been lost to you.
enjoy life, explore..and Never depend on anybody for your happiness.
As you grow older..the dealing doesn't get easier..it just gets..done, sweetie.
Time heals all wounds, you'll be fine
Find someone new
I'm guessing you're a gay dude? That would mean you have 1% to 4% of the population to choose from. You could be single for a long time.
Not necessarily, a new love has amazing healing power