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Don't know that it's right or wrong, but it is understandable. Have you spoken to him about it? What about having his son come and visit with you on some holidays?

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**** christ, who's boy friend is he any way? Why the f uck would he be spending time with her at all?

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You are not wrong....he has an obligation, and should spend time with his son....but, the ex, is the ex for a reason, and she should not be the one, getting YOUR bf, on Thanksgiving.....I hope there isn't anything kindling between them.....I'd wonder why he would do that, and not invite you....<br />
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I think a good arrangement, would be for him to pick up his son, and spend half the day with him, and the ex can spend the second half with the son.....this would allow you to be in the son's life, too, without the ex looking on....<br />
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It's awkward, at best...but he should consider your feelings on this subject....I hope you've talked to him about it....

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Oh, once you have children it's never about you again until you stuff their clothes and stereo in the dorm room. Too many kids and too many exes. This is about your daughter. You make Thanksgiving for your daughter and start your own tradition. You putting your daughter first is no different than his doing that with his son. That he favors the four year old this year doesn't mean that it will be that way next year. But, what he does at Thanksgiving means nothing to your child--only to you. And big heads up--daughters need mothers and sons need fathers. Is that so weird? Your daughter is going to grow into a woman and she needs a template for that--you. Thanksgiving is a big woop who cares? If, you push onto your daughter your own feelings of jealousy and need--well, she'll eat that up like turkey. She's your little butterball and he needs to matter not. That is why it's hard to have children--they outweigh all your own needs.

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The kid isn't the issue, it is the boy friend, that **** is wrong. If he wanted to see his kid, he would bring him home. If he is going for visitation he needs to include you as simple as that.

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it's understandable

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