I broke up with my ex, and he tells me there's nothing more to life anymore...

Asked By: Elixirs 26-30, F 1 year ago

What do i do? I believe people are responsible for their own actions so i tell him - it's his choice- i can't stand emotional blackmail - my parents are so afraid he'll do something crazy.

Anyone been through this before?
Elixir. C.

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6 Answers to "I broke up with my ex, and he tells me there's nothing more to life anymore..."

Posted by Paschar Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:36PM

Yea My ex pulled the same garbadge on me my reply was , Sorry gal I ain't biting that kind of bait anymore , Don't let the door hit ya where the sun don't shine on the way out .

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Posted by LittleRedShoes Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:34PM

This is a common thing to happen. Seems to be all part of the process. The still living together is probably really not helping. I know you said before that financially its not going to be easy to afford home alone but you really need to find a way to get apart. If its over he needs to understand that. It can seem scary and easy to worry they will do something stupid.

If you want to try to stay friends then you need to tell him that you want to do that but that you cant if he refuses to accept that you do not have a future together as a couple. I've had people try to do the whole emotional blackmail thing on me before and I have just been pretty harsh. If I know for sure that they are only doing it to get to me I have said 'fine you do what you feel you need to do but I wont give in to your threats. I'd rather you didnt do something stupid but I am not going to lie to you and act like we have a future just to stop you.' It can be scary, you may feel guilty but sometimes a tough approach is required

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Posted by hawaiiansun Dec 24th, 2011 at 11:49PM

i am speaking from experience, you need to get away from this guy. I was with this woman once and she made me feel the same way when I decided to leave her. In the relationship she was hurtful, controlling and not healthy in her way of thinking, always negative about practically everything. She said she would be hurt and had no reason to live anymore if we stopped seeing each other. It was overwhelming at first, she cried and begged me not to go. But once she saw that I made up my mind, omg, talk about a 180 in attitude. Called me a loser and anything else she could think of. She has since moved on and from what I hear, she has a fiance who like being submissive to her.

He will bring you down until you;re so depressed that anything will sound right to you... he is bad news if he is trying to make you feel guilty like that.. if he really loved you, he would NOT make you feel that way!

Its hard but are you willing to be depressed and being with someone that you dont even want to be with for the rest of your life?! Be strong and leave him, everyone else thinks so too.

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Posted by BestAsianWife Dec 24th, 2011 at 11:31PM

Yes.... My ex BF once told me he will commit suicide if I don,t return to Him. So I give him a bottle of poison. He is still alive. He refuse to drink it because it smells bad.

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Posted by hopefullyhumble Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:21PM

you are right, he has to deal with his insecurities...would he go to individual counseling? or does he have a pastor or someone he trusts he can confide in? you are right not to take him back...it would be for the wrong reason(s) and would not work for long anyway

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Posted by Dave748 Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:21PM

I've been the guy! You are NOT responsible for him. He needs to find his own way out of this dark night of the soul. Going back to him would just delay his inevitable pain and it would make you unhappy. Make it as clean a break as you can. Get away from him.

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Reply by Elixirs Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:23PM

dave hun this is easier than said - we are still living together - i thought it would be okay to be flatmates but he's telling me things like life is insignificnt. And then i'm worried that if i do a clean cut between us he'll find me and kill me or soemthing bizaree like that.
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Reply by Dave748 Dec 24th, 2011 at 8:35PM

He is feeling sorry for himself. Don't let him use guilt to control you. Can you move out, go live with your parents, perhaps?
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