I had to leave a relationship with my mom for 15 years (until she died). This culture would shame me for it, because of the whole theory of one momma (doesn't work for reincarnationists). But being a mother is not instinctive to all women. Giving birth does not make a mother. Some mothers actually prey on their children and would hurt them in order to make the mothers feel better about themselves. A good book on this is "Toxic Parents". Sometimes, you have to let go. In my case, my mother could not allow me to be happy with myself; she seemed happiest with me when I was depressed. When I decided that I didn't want her to live both her life AND mine too, I had to go. I still loved her, but from a safe distance.
I felt that way too. I didn't talk to my mom for a year because I couldn't take the way she was and what she did to everyone, holding on to a grude that just fueled the fire. She died recently. I wish I could have made amends but its too late. Just remember...anyday could be the last and would you be ok if you had to leave things the way they are?
Love your mother for one day she will not be around, Learn to forgive no matter how hard.