I presume your trying to kill yourself out of pain or loneliness or something else all together. But what if killing yourself doesn't bring you what your looking for. Example it's horrible on the other side too. There is no coming back to make it better.
Do you want to succeed leaving the ICU and then try to kill yourself again or you want to succeed living?
and still you're able to access the internet ..Hmmm
succeed with suicide? .....nah, i like company
Succeed in life, or succeed in your next suicide attempt? Because only one of those two has a future I want to be a part of.
I feel your pain for I have been to that point myself and nearly am now but help you I cannot for I could not do that in good conscience sorry.....