Resolved Question

faceless man at the alter. It was a planned wedding and I was wearing a white wedding gown. I said"I cant marry you because I am still in love with my ex. Then I woke up very confused. I have been divorced for 11 years and really thought I had closure and moved on. I currently have not been in a relationship for 6 years due to raising kids returning to school etc.

"I currently have not been in a relationship for 6 years due to raising kids returning to school etc."

This line indicates that you would pursue a relationship if it weren't for your kids. Thus, the urge is there, but repressed. Freud would ascribe the "faceless man" to be your dad/father figure, and the ex merely being a symbol of father rejection/abandonment.

I would go a step further and say that, in a contemporary sense, you are merely reconciling your split drives of sexuality and motherhood.

There is, without a doubt, unconscious resentment towards both.