Well close your eyes and think of times when you were not broken
it's so nice to see people who i have something in common with. i have a very bad back too. try meditating, hypnosis. idk if you know about them, but there's micro frequency therapy, to level out the frequencys in your brain & body & they actually help relieve pain or even stop it. i have a machine, it's called "AlphaStim" maybe look into it & tell your docter that you want to try it. you have to get passed for it, but it's deff. worth it. my mom is a chronic pain patient and it also works for her.
try hypnosis? maybe.