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...that is my challenge everyday...
seagoat2 seagoat2 56-60, F 13 Answers Oct 23, 2012 in Hobbies

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There is something going on that prevents him from being motivated. He may feel or even had a teacher tell him that he is stupid; he may have anger or frustration with his life and feel insecure; he may not have strong male role models? If any of those, he needs someone to gain his trust, listen to him and help him deal with issues instead of just treating symptoms.

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couldnt have put it better myself, coach!

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...he is without a dad...so I just hooked together with the after school supervisor (a young man), who said he was very similar to my student as his age...as well as parent & advocate conference...today is Tues...& today was a GOOD day for him...he actually started taking responsibility for himself...I could tell he felt good about it...one day at a time...I felt proud of him...but more important...he felt proud of himself...(brought tears to my eyes...been trying oodles of approaches for 4 weeks now...something is clicking...

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that is great to hear. Continue to look for opportunities to connect him with those positive role models. But great to hear that things are improving. thanks for being diligent about finding solutions. It's a lot easier to just give up and give in.

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My daughter teaches kids in this category almost one on one and she has told me that a computer (used with adult supervision) can be very helpful. Almost all kids, even those with troubled home lives, are fascinated by today's technologies and everything they learn about them will help them with further studies and is of some value in the work place. It is amazing how quickly kids can learn complex subjects once you capture and harness their interest. Using the internet reinforces the importance of reading and spelling. Search engines like Google prompt you with "Did you mean ....:" when you enter a search string and suggest alternate spellings which may or may not apply to a particular search. I am not a teacher but I believe that all learning depends on three things namely Interest, Attention and Understanding, and if any two of those things are present to begin with the third will grow as a result. Yourself + the internet can guarantee Interest and Attention. Understanding is bound to follow. The technology itself is a legitimate field of interest valued by employers and is useful in business and education alike. Familiarity with different types of computers aaaaaaaaaaaa (that's my cat walking across the keyboard) and basic operations performed with the mouse, and keyboard layout are hurdles that some people never clear due to fear and lack of confidence. The correct language associated with these operations is a great place to begin and will give your students a head start towards graduating high school if that's what they want to do. The answer is right in front of you seagoat2. They already have the Interest. You can guide their Attention and watch their Understanding grow.

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....I give you high-five with your stellar three: Interest, Attention, & Understanding!!! I like your thinking! Yes, to the internet & I am at this very juncture in my life attempting to "flip my classroom"...which is to make it technology based...it is a complete "jump" for me....like jumping in the deep end, only knowing "dog-paddling" but counting on eventually learning to swim...I have the support of people at the county level wanting to come out...starting in December to assist, scaffold, & teach me. I teach computers for 2 hours a week to my class & have four, up & working computers in my classroom...mahalo, for your insightful answer! Your ending sentence could be made into a poster, "They already have the interest. You can guide their Attention & watch their Understanding grow." How lucky is YOUR daughter to have a dad like YOU....

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seagoat2 I think I'm the lucky one. My efforts have been rewarded a thousand fold. After their mum took them (I have a son also) away from me because she wanted to live with another man I had the privilege of paying for their education and having them for one day a week. In the days before I had ever used a computer I would take them to the bulk discount book store and say to them "pick any book you want and I will read it to you". Then we would go to McDonalds and read the books they had chosen. I have never known a kid to refuse a trip to McDonalds. This gave them a 'McHappy' association with reading, something which a surprising number of kids miss out on today. Complete strangers have stopped me on the street with tears in their eyes to ask me 'my secret' for raising kids like those. The books cost less than the McDonalds but the benefits were permanent. My 'method' was simple but not easy.

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Remember , I wraised a son alone-it's a haard age and evven harder for him now-what my sons ccounselor did made every difference in his life. He told him that if he didn't miss school for 6 weeks they'd go to his ffavorite restaurant. SON IS DOING GREAT-34 AND THEYSTILL GO TO LUNCH. It only takes one thing to make a difference sometimes something simple.

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....that is such a heart-warming story, sibyll!!! and I completely agree that is takes one thing to make a difference....and sometimes something so simple!!!! Mahalo for taking the time to share your story!!!

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I'd show him the lifestyle he's choosing. Show him the kind of apartments he'd live in, the jobs he'd have, etc.

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...that is a powerful suggestion, robotmusic7...I have this cool volunteer who has developed an entire curriculum call "Looking Forward"...having to do with just that! It's exciting...

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How exciting! Let me know how it goes.

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First find out what the blockage is. What is his family situation like? I remember being really scared to leave high school because I knew college would be tough and I was afraid to be in a loudsy job. Then after you find out what the problem is you can offer some motivation tailored to his fears.

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Are his living conditions bad? I can't imagine that they would be good for him to be "at risk." Maybe you could equate education with freedom?

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...I like your analogy of education with freedom...& yes, I just found out that there is minimal lighting at his home...electric issues...so am working with him to accomplish what he needs to get done in the afterschool program...

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"Hey, do you want to flip burgers everyday for the rest of your life? ..... No, I didn't think so, now get to work." ---like that.

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Ask him if it makes sense to quit school to go to work at McDonalds.

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the females are there try the idea that the girls are there in collage and high school so he will never get a girlfriend if he quits

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...girls are often a BIG motivation!...I work in a rural K-8 school...so these kids have been together FOREVER!!!...& he is not well thought of by the girls...however, he has quite a "style" going on...& wants to go to HS...I told him...he is going to have to prove himself if he wants to graduate him from 8th grade...he is starting to listen & I hooked him up with a guy role model (since he has not dad)

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Sheet on him

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Here is an unusual angle. Check out the unschooling websites and see if it works for him. Have an open mind when you look at it. <br />
Another suggestion would be to recognize that he is still a kid and not old enough to think about his future. Here is another thing. My best friend's kid was brilliant all through elementary school. He failed eighth grade twice. He just wasn't into it. His parents moved him to another school that was four days a week. That worked for him. So it could be the environment or it could be his age.

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