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I have been married for 20 years and I am in love with someone else who doesn't know it. I have known this person for al

I am in love with someone who doesn't know it. But I am married.

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6 Answers to "I have been married for 20 years and I am in love with someone else who doesn't know it. I have known this person for al"

  1. luvsall3232 - 51-55 years old - male

    Posted by luvsall3232 Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:27PM

    why did you Marry? you are living a lie.

    Like (2)

  2. StarMommyO - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by StarMommyO Oct 25th, 2012 at 1:59PM

    *raising hand* I went through the same... I fell for my best friend of 30 years after being with my husband for 20+ years... but since my soulmate is 600 miles away, we decided that we would not wait for each other but deep inside we always will. However, I am still going through with the divorce. If I truly loved him, I would not fall for the second guy so this told me a lot.

    Like (1)

  3. ch014h6677 - 36-40 years old

    Posted by ch014h6677 Mar 21st, 2012 at 3:51PM

    If you don't love your hubby and are unhappy. Try getting something going with this other guy.if you don't try you will always be left wondering. Just tell hubby you want separate for a while then you can see this other guy and see if he's the better one for you.

    Like (1)

  4. roselevalley - 41-45 years old

    Reply by roselevalley Mar 22nd, 2012 at 9:05AM

    I would like so much to do that, but so so scared because we are good friends, he's like a big brother to me, I just don't want to lose that.

    Like (1)

  5. EmilyFaith77 - 16-17 years old - female

    Posted by EmilyFaith77 Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:23PM

    I see... I'm fifteen, but I'll give this my best shot,

    Are you in love with your spouse? If not you need to quit feeling bad about it and tell him/her. You need to talk to this other person you are in love with, but it's much better to act without the attached marriage than it is to tell your love while you're still married, even if you have no intentions of hurting your spouse, one thing does lead to another and you will end up hurting everyone, yourself included.

    Remember that this is your life, the only one you get to live. It has been twenty years but do you really want to wait another minute? Time is going by for heaven's sake.

    But, if you are in love with both your love and your spouse, well... That's where things are confusing. Talk to your spouse, he/she needs to know what's going on, it isn't easy, but you have to tell. You are lying by omission if you don't tell, and even if you are not in love, this is still a marriage and you took vows, be honest. Be an open book.

    I don't know if this helps at all but I've been dating this guy for a year and a half, and I liked this other guy at one point, I was scared to tell my boyfriend but I did and things were worked out. I realized that even though I liked this other guy, he was a total *** and could never be anything like what my boyfriend is for me. Understanding and forever patient with someone as batty as me.

    Good luck :)

    Like (1)

  6. roselevalley - 41-45 years old

    Reply by roselevalley Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:35PM

    thanks for the advise, but i can see i have made a big mistake by posting this thought for the world to see. I can see where people are going to jude me because I am married, however they don't anything about my marriage and how we have just grown apart. BigBig Mistake.

    Like (1)

  7. EmilyFaith77 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by EmilyFaith77 Mar 21st, 2012 at 3:55PM

    Well, you are just reaching out for advice. There's nothing to judge about. You have done nothing wrong at all. You have not cheated on your spouse, you developed a feeling for someone else. You love someone else, you don't CHOOSE who you love, you just LOVE. Obviously you feel bad and confused about this if you are asking for advice and not just telling your spouse to get lost. You have done nothing wrong. It's ok :)

    Like (1)

    2 more replies
  8. SkippingTheGoldenYears - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by SkippingTheGoldenYears Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:09PM

    You should not be with your spouse if you are in love with someone else, that's just not fair at all

    Like (1)

  9. roselevalley - 41-45 years old

    Reply by roselevalley Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:13PM

    truely I know its not fair, however there is way more to this.

    Like (1)

  10. ddandme - 36-40 years old - female

    Posted by ddandme Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:07PM

    if you edit your details you can add the rest of your question

    Like (1)

  11. roselevalley - 41-45 years old

    Reply by roselevalley Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:14PM

    I noticed that, I guess maybe I just wanted to see if there was someone who might be going through what I'm going through.

    Like (1)

  12. ddandme - 36-40 years old - female

    Reply by ddandme Mar 21st, 2012 at 1:17PM

    Remember tho the hurt you will put on your current partner..Could you live with that? But hey it dont sound like your getting all your needs met now or you wouldn't be in love with another ..You only live once right

    Like (1)

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