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I love my husband, but am not in love with him. Should I give it another chance?

I was 19 when my husband proposed. He was still in high school & we got married after 6months. We got pretty hot & heavy but after the wedding it was like a light switch. I don't remember the last time I was attracted to him. 2 yrs ago I went back to school & being around people my age I feel like I'm wasting my best years. In the past year & a half we'd distanced ourselves & grown completely apart. We tried counseling & it helped for him but not me. 2 months ago I met someone. Until then I didn't think I could ever be attracted to anyone & might as well stay w/my husband. I've wished I had a chance to be on my own, but never had the courage before. Realizing I can feel that kind of passion I started slowly ending it. He moved out officially about a week ago, a trial separation. He's the sweetest guy & no one will ever love me like he does. But I love him like a brother & he deserves more. Is there any chance I could ever have passion for him again or is it hopeless? months since we..

Posted 5 months ago

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If you truly believe that you are experiencing more than the usual lows of a relationship that goes on for a while, then leave. If you aren't happy, you aren't happy. You can't make your heart feel something that it won't. But, be advised, all relationships are exciting and new in the beginning, but all that superficial stuff fades. You may find yourself with the new guy in the same situation that you are with your husband.

Posted 5 months ago

Other 7 Answers to I love my husband, but am not in love with him. Should I give it another chance?

whowasthatmaskedm an	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 9:48PM I'm going to risk people screming "sexist" here. But scientific studies have revealed that most women change after a few years in their feelings toward a male. At first they get that hot rush and can't get enough of him, but later this can cool down (Often associated with childbirth) Hopefully during that time the bonding between the couple has grown and formed a new, lasting relationship which still includes sexual attraction, but carrys elements of respect and cooperation which take time to grow. If you're looking for a permanent hot rush of passion, you are doomed to disspointment I'm afraid. But is all depends on your definition of love and being in love, doesn't it? Rated: +3Vote for this!
c8lorraine	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 4:38PM if no kids...just walk ! you got married way too young, and you are wasting your best years. How would you feel turning 40 and stayed in this marriage...glad or distraught. Rated: +1Vote for this!
jgurl006	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 4:25PM my personal experiences have shown me that once you enter that "brother" stage of the relationship it is really had to return back to lovers. i understand that "i love him, but i'm not in love with him." because being in love and then just loving someone is very different. we love our animals, friends, showers, etc. but to have a true relationship you have to be in love with someone. i think this is a healthy step, just taking a break and re-examining your life separately and together and taking it from there. maybe you will realize why you fell in love with him or maybe it will just confirm that its time to move on. I wish you and your husband well and good luck. Rated: +1Vote for this!
tat2doc	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 4:23PM I don't think you're gonna change how you feel so I'd say no. My ex's still love me & I still love them. But it's equal to the love between friends, not romantic partners or husband & wife. Rated: +1Vote for this!
thumbelina3	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 3:46PM I would not say it is "hopeless." I would say that it seems a healthy time for you to part. Your relationship is no longer healthy for either of you and it's no longer making you happy. I think that the best thing for you to do now is appreciate what your relationship once was and move on. In the long run, both of you will be happier. You both deserve happiness. I think that you should both talk openly about your feelings. If you want to give it another shot, go for it. If not, then don't feel guilty. Just focus on what is best for each of you. I know that this is much easier said than done. I wish both of you the best. Rated: +1Vote for this!
WishIwasNotaMothe r	Posted Jun 14th, 2009 at 8:51PM Sounds like a normal marriage. After years of being together, most people love their partner, but if you are always looking for that "in love new feeling" you may always be searching.... Rated: +1Vote for this!
ljhw	Posted Jun 15th, 2009 at 4:00PM Try the separation for awhile and I think by your feelings whether you are missing him or not will give you your answer. Do you have children? If so there is a lot more to consider. How does he feel? The same way that you are feeling? These are all questions that you need to answer yourself. Take some time for yourself and in time you will have found your answer. Good Luck! Rated: +1Vote for this!

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