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He has never done anything with a guy, but we together have had our moments. He has said he loves me but he isn't "in love" with me. I've reciprocated, but I think I have other feelings. He has been out-of-the-closet for a few years now (we're both in college and are seniors), and we have been tied at the hip our entire college career. He just went on a date with a guy for the first time the other day, and it is so hard. I know the guy too, the three of us were in music, but the guy he is dating is almost 9 years older than him. My best friend is very mature, so it will probably turn out to be a great relationship. We haven't talked about it in person, only over the phone. I can't even look at him. I don't want him to see me cry, but it hurts so much hearing him say how cute he is and what a nice person he is. They sound like they're great for each other and I just want to be happy for him. I don't think I can stay behind this shield any longer. Help me. Please?
AGirlChic AGirlChic 18-21, F 8 Answers Jun 9, 2011

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My best friend is a gay man and there was a time when we were both attracted to each other but we would not be as good of friends as we are now if we ever would have done anything. I always found him attractive but the thought of him being with men made it weird. If we were to ever hook up It would have been a bit weird to think of him having sex with men. He is gay and I would always think that I am not really what he wants so I couldn't ever satisfy him the way he wants. That did it for me. I love him and he is great but we are much better friends than anything else.

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That's the problem. We have done something.

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My boyfriend said he was gay before we started dating... It's been about five months now and I found out he's been talking and looking at gay ****.. I don't know what to do he says he will never do it again please help.... Confused might be pregnant.... He says he loves me is this all a big lie???

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never<br />
you can never get a better friend

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LOVE is crazy lke that..huh? Try and accept it ad love can still be there.............but it will alter to a diff. sort of love if u let it.

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right, when u first met him was there something that annoyed you about him?<br />
Or does anything now annoy you?<br />
focus on it, make it larger than life, believe me it works. I fell for my gay best mate!

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Get as far away from him as you can, live in a different city, try not calling him so often, make your own life, one that doesn't involves him, let him know this doesn't mean he is not important to you but that you both must grow a little bit apart to fully grow. You must remember yourself that he is gay, and he is never going to see you the ways you want, and that he doesn't have the same relationship that you have with him, you are inlove, that doesn't go away but you can manage it to the point of been comfortable enough to be happy for him and for you of making your life happen too, eventually you will meet someone new someone that will give you all those things you want from a man and not just the emotional part. Your best friend is someone important for you, you don't want to hurt him, in order to do that you must change, start with you behavior and your mind will catch up, start seen yourself with other men in your head, don't permit his memory when you think of love or sex, you will develop new filling for him, this new learning will override the other feelings. Remember this always. Remember he will never think of you first, he will think of himself first, and you must think of you first too.

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