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I am seventeen years old and my boyfriend is twenty years old. We have been together happily for two years, have dealt with grief in both our families, serious issues and worked through problems. At the end of next year we are planning to move to Canterbury together, as I am planning to attend University of Canterbury. At that point I will be eighteen and him twenty one. I would like to know if people thinks this is too fast or a wrong idea. It just intrigues me.
tonang8 tonang8 16-17, F 6 Answers Dec 19, 2012 in Dating & Relationships

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I think you're courageous. <br />
Yes you are young, and yes there is a lot you haven't dealt with yet, and studying while living together is not an easy task, but if you love and trust him enough to want to try it, I'd say go for it. <br />
I hope you do make sure you have some sort of safety net, just in case.

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Thank you Quantumphysica. I have family in Canterbury so a safety net is there. I know my cousin and her husband would take me in if anything happened.
It is nice to hear that someone else believes it is possible despite my age. Thank you

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Good to hear that. You're welcome.

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As long as neither of you are compromising your relationships or future goals too much, i think it's good. For example, if you will lose favour from your families for doing this, then it might be unwise (unless you don't care for them). If either of you is making big sacrifice, it might not be worth it, and someone couldl hold it against the other in the future. But if all the pieces fit, then I think it's great!

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My parents love the idea. My extended family is happy and accepts him. His parents are already talking about helping us find a house.
I would never do something as big as this without my Mum's permission (She is hugely influential in my life).
Canterbury has the best options for his future job (the earthquakes) and I have to go to University down there as none of the Uni's around here have my course! (It is a rare course haha).
Thank you Agonystick!

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Damn that sounds like all the pieces fit! I wish I had your perfect life!!!

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Haha took a long time to get to this. I have had my fair share of bad relationships with males (not just boyfriends, any type of relationships)
I hope things work out well for you!

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Yeah, everyone's got ups and downs, as I'm sure you'll experience in the future. But to me it sounds like you've got everything pretty well figured out for a good while. Just make sure you enjoy it! And thanks very much for the good wishes.

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as far i see it both of you think and d things together and support each other which all shows your maturity at a young age..age does not count all the time.there are many people who luk mature when they are old but maybe the world's biggest babies.! u are continuing your education which is a good call...and you guys learnt to love each other no matter what.so go for it...listen to your heart.but finish your schooling

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Thank you angelice123.
It shall be an adventure as such!

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Congratulations! You really have to do what is best for you. Why does how society views it matter? There are questions you ask others and those you don't. This is definitely in the latter category. Make your own choices and live you own life.

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Thank you LovesHangover
I am not basing my decisions off these answers. I have just always been interested in how other people view things. As we all have differences in opinion and I love seeing that. The human brain is amazing haha.

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The relationship "intrigues" you? That's an odd way of describing it.<br />
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I hope you are seriously going to pursue your education and not have that play second fiddle to your relationship. Boyfriends come and go in your life .. but your future ability to support yourself and find a direction in your life is much more important at this point.<br />
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I think at your age you're too young to be living with someone. <br />
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You talk about the grief and problems you two have shared, but you never mentioned if you really "love" or care about HIM. I question if you're doing this for the right reasons ... enough that they could sustain the pressures of school and living together.

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Society view intrigues me.
I am absolutely serious about schooling. Education comes first, always has and always will. I achieve quite well at school but do not like boasting about it. I was brought up in a strict household and I am fully aware of the fact boyfriends come and go.
I do love him and care about him. I was just trying to explain that we have faced conflict and come through the other side. He means a great deal to me. He isn't everything, I do have my own friends etc.
I know University is going to be hard. He himself is in University (Mechanical Engineering).
Thank you for your valuable points.

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You need to do what's right for YOU. Not what society or some strangers on the internet think.

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I will do what is right for me. This is just... like an experiment as such

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Well first of all HOW SPECIAL! School in Canterbury...Like in Thomas A` becket?? The relationship...Personally I'd wait till after school. ( two big steps at one tine thingie)

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Not like that sadly! I live in Wellington, New Zealand. So I am moving to the South Island for University.
Thank you for your point Benetal.

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Tw tho and good luck oxox

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