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IHatemyselfforhatingme IHatemyselfforhatingme 16-17 17 Answers Dec 9, 2012 in Family Struggles

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My heart goes out to you.<br />
<br />
This is your decision.<br />
I'm sure your therapist has told you this wasn't your fault. And it WASN'T!!!<br />
You were a child!!!!<br />
<br />
It will be harder on your Mom, if she knew and trusted (and loved) the person.<br />
Be prepared, she might get angry, and blame herself.<br />
<br />
You have three options.<br />
1. You need your Mom's support right now, and take the risk. <br />
The majority of Mother's will rally around you. <br />
2. Give yourself time, and go at your own pace. You've gotten this far.<br />
3. Keep it to yourself. Some people can't move forward with out dealing with it. Some regret saying anything. <br />
<br />
This is all up to you, and how you think you can handle it. Be prepared, YOU might have to be there for your Mom, before she can be there for you. <br />
(She might wonder what she could have done to protect you, and why you couldn't tell her before).<br />
<br />
I pray strength, peace and healing for you!<br />
(((Hugs)))

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yes, your parents should know also, get the name and addresses of those bas**** grow up earn enough --> pay the mafia and if possible get them killed.

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If you're close with your mom and feel that you can trust her with what you're dealing with then... tell her! If you're not close with your mom then I'd say to tell her anyway to make her feel guilty!! It depends on the situation. However, I think if this is bothering you still that it is important that you get it out in the open. The people that care about you the most would want to know what is going on with you.

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Stalk the rapist. Then go to his or her house. When you get to their house give them a romantic bath. Tell him or her to wait in the tub while you get your close off. Take your close off go to the kitchen grab a toaster and drop it in the bathtub.

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Ask your therapist.

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ABSOLUTELY. No question...

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This may sound harsh. but i don't think you want people to say, I'm sorry, or take their pity. Right? If I am correct read on…<br />
<br />
No matter the embarrassment, it doesn't matter. Is she worth it? To tell her what is wrong? Is it worth it to say: I survived. I am me. I am in control. No one can make me back down from the truth…no matter how hard it is to say what is 100% true?<br />
<br />
If you can answer yes to all of my questions, it won't be as bad, even if you are scared. Write it down if you'd rather not talk. Or record the confession of your truth if you don't want her to see you as you say it. <br />
<br />
Either way…both of you deserve a chance.

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so maybe i should write a note to her letting her kno?

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If that is the only way you feel comfortable. Do you want me to tell you my idea?

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yes please tell me

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My idea: Practice writing it down. All in one day. Before giving a note to her maybe try reading it out load in a whisper. You may get to the point when you can just tell her. Or you can start out reading it to her, and if you have to stop, have her Finnish reading it. It's your choice, your call. I hope I can help, even at my inexperienced age if 14.

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Oh and when I say in one day, it is not to rush you. I don't want it painful for you to remember everything for weeks as you try to write it. That's why I said one day, so you only have to deal with the most of it on that one day. Make sense? I hope…

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2 More Responses

Absolutely without a doubt yesss...by saying nothing at all you are allowing another person to be a potential victim......if you can't find the strength for yourself then find the strength to stop the next person from going what you went thru

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so sorry hun that is so horrible for you to have to go through alone.yes you should defiently tell your mom,i know i have always told my kids that no matter what someone says or does to you always tell me.i dont know who did this to you,but no matter who it is you need to tell your mom:)

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I would after discussing it with the therapist - not for advise on if - but advise on how to, and on preparing for the various kinds of typical reactions. That can be as big of a blow as anything. Yet Mom might be relieved in knowing a suspicion she's had was true... <br />
<br />
Good luck , and sorry to hear of your ordeal from back then.

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Thats a very serious question. A question i don't think i am qualified to answer. You are there in your situation, you know your mom, you must assess the situation for yourself and decide when to tell your mom. Hoping you have peace within no matter what you decide to do.

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Yes you should, it may help you more than the therapist. Best of luck

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yes, your parents need top know what is hurting you, it will affect what kind of adult you become, let them know....

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im pretty sure your therapist will let her and the police know

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This should happen if the asker is a minor, without a doubt. They are legally obliged...at least in my country!... when it comes to sex crimes. Mom needs to know right away because she will be investigated by CPS as standard procedure. When my daughter was raped this happened to me.

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yea i know but her age is showing 16-17

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If you want her comfort. I'm sure she would be understandable.

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