It sounds like she is experiencing your efforts to be caring as being too intrusive, and she wants you to let her make her own mistakes perhaps. She wants to be independent, even if that means she doesn't always make the right choices. It can be a good but hard lesson - stepping back, but that's what you need to do. Tell her you are stepping back now, but to let you know if she finds she needs a bit of support from you - that you'll be there for her (within reason).
Simply say, "I will be here for you if you need me." Then wait, which is the hardest of all things to do
Perhaps you are " acting motherly " because their is something about her that correlates to being naive or weak and she senses that so try to understand how she perceives said treatment. It may in fact be handicapping her...your parachute.
The right way for Me(I) lol would be to not ACT at all and continue to love and care as I am or Em. If it is an annoyance to another SoBe it. If tbey are THE LOVED ONE, and are annoyed file it under tough ****. and carry on your way practicing with patience and tolerance.. If love is rejected try not to be too discouraged. Give repectful slace and seek comfort that they will soon need you and in al your daily training you will ahve the proper amount of reserves in your deep reservoir to allow them to awim to safety in your pool os love.
When people are growing up they want " To Find Themselves " for some that means " Rebellion " for others it means compromise>others are almost born mature " from the beginning " Those teens are instantly grown up. They dont go through a phase However..To them, the rebel, they might see you as " Invincible" afraid of nothing. They lack confidence. Tell them about how you grow up. Try to do some things together. They want to grow up at once People are like puppies, they have different personalities .Your daughter might be like a younger version of you, or quite the opposite. I suggest any " Heart to Heart's "are NOT done at home. Chats at that age must be seen to be private. They might see " HOME " as a "Battleground ". War zones are not the place for privacy. What not take her and a friend of hers for tea or clothes shopping. Letting her know you like her friend/s will build a bridge to together-ness Try to reassure her. She knows you love her but perhaps is afraid to open up.
May be you care too much and she feels not trusted. May be you think unless you act on her behalf she will not do it, give her some space of her own. Don't keep asking her, did you sleep well, did you eat, do you need a drink, do you need a massage, why do you look dull, etc, These questions really irritate anyone. some times women need to be ignored, so that they will have time to think about you.
If you would like a true answer, I think you need to be a little more specific about what you're doing when you "care" about her.
just be yourself, unless that self is really possesive and wants to know what time she got back, left, eat, slept, periods, bowel movements, then that's to motherly, lol, like darknesscalls put wait for her to come to you but let her know she always can.