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trails trails 56-60, F 15 Answers Feb 28, 2011

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It makes sense but sometimes a lack of motivation is holding them back.

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Would you believe that sometimes there is nothing you can do about what plagues you except to grit your teeth and vow not to be beaten?Sometimes it really is the only way you can fight against the situation.If circumstances are such you cannot prove and remove,then you can only stand firm.

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They might've gotten some bad advice somewhere from a source they really trusted that really put them in a ditch, because it turns out their previous life wasn't so hot either. Maybe the situation they're in now is the price they gotta pay for the support they were given chasing the "advice" that was given. It could be better but this is the way it is...for now.

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There's "venting" so that you can "let it go" and then there's dwelling on it and complaining about the same thing repetitively. I agree that a sympathetic ear CAN help us get over it. That person lending the ear has to figure out whether the other person is complaining with a purpose or complaining just to whine. Ask, "What are you planning to do about ....." or "How do you suppose you can overcome this challenge?" The answer to those open-ended types of questions will let you know if the person is actually trying to do something to better his or her situation. I have a martyring, blamescaping relative who drives me crazy, always accusing others of causing her to be miserable. Only she can make herself miserable - nobody else has the power to MAKE you sad, or angry, or upset.

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i concur. when you don't like your lot in life, get up off the couch and do something about it.

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I agree with Naturallytanned - sometimes a sympathetic ear is part of the solution.

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Yes it makes alot of sense.

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.....I guess the hardest part is to get beyond that phase and follow with a plan. Lack of motivation is a big part of the problem.

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There is some sense to that, yes.

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sometimes it's easier said than done. most of the time, yes, they need to quit complaining and get up and do something, but then again, sometimes situations are out of their control, and there's not really much they can do. I've been in that spot before. Thankfully, not anymore!

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It does make sense. Sometimes the first step is hard to take.

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They may lack a good example

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