Post
Seriously. I hear so much about forgiveness and how it's bad to hold on to anger. If we forgive unconditionally are we sending the message..hey you can do whatever you want to people because they will simply forgive you or act like nothing happened ?
bitterdregs bitterdregs 46-50, F 17 Answers Nov 13, 2010

Your Response

Cancel

I certainly hope it does, then i might get my Three Grand back.

Best Answer

it will be healing for yourself and if you forgive others your heavenly father will forgive you also.

Best Answer

I do not think that forgiving someone whom has hurt you is giving them a license to abuse but rather it leads by example.<br />
It is not your job to "teach" them right from wrong, but rather falls upon that person to regulate their own moral compass...<br />
Sadly, some people never learn but in the end, your conscience is clear and you don't hold onto bitterness and anger. If you do, you only hurt yourself.<br />
Hope this helps :)

Best Answer

Disagree choctawgrrl - would you let criminals set their own moral compass?

Best Answer

In my experience no, it only enables them.

Best Answer

Forgiving someone who has harmed you is a gift you give yourself and the other person. It should be given without expectation of anything in return. It's also not your job to each anyone anything.

Best Answer

I would say from personal experience that forgiving someone who has hurt you and who still behaves badly opens yourself up to further hurt. There is a strength to be gained from walking away and not forgiving, you are saying it was not ok to hurt you I dont forgive. Sometimes people are bad and I disagree with some of the above comments, bad behaviour does require the censure of others,it is up to the individual to set the boundaries of how they will be treated by others. Being a pushover most of the time, I can honestly say that after repeated bad behaviour letting that person know how they affected me and witholding forgiveness made me feel better, even 2 years later.

Best Answer

I think in part it has to do with how much you are going to interact with this person. It is easy to forgive someone you don't have to see all the time because there is little chance of them repeating the action. However you don't forgive an abuser then put youself in a situation where they can do it again because 9/10 they will. Forgivenss and healing can only come after the violence has stopped.

Best Answer

It is not you job to teach them anything and even if you could force them to apologize or admit guilt it will not change that. You forgive others for you not them.

Best Answer

No. you don't forgive for their sake; you forgive for your own. For that purpose, it's not necessary to go to that person and tell them personally, "I forgive you," unless it's a relationship you want to keep; but then why would you want to keep a relationship with someone who thinks it's ok to act as they did? Forgiveness is letting go, setting yourself free. It may just be the act of letting them go and going on your way to grow from the experience, while they're stuck in the past.<br />
<br />
Forgiveness isn't meant to teach the offender. That's what revenge is for, and that's a whole 'nother discussion.

Best Answer

I do it for me & leave the rest to God, isn't my job to teach or change anyone inner self. <br />
This reminds me of my mother. She's wronged me in the worst way. I'll come over after months of ignoring her. She stands there without fault with her arms folded UNTIL I grab a hold of her and tell her 'I love you mama' over & over yet today I have no intentions of seeing her again because of repeated behavior from her.<br />
That's what you get for giving in and forgiving. My conscience is clear and I sleep well.

Best Answer

frogivness is for yourself.. and it can teach someone by looking at your actions... karma

Best Answer

you've taken the high road.

Best Answer

Yes it can send them that message if they're selfish consciousless persons. What matters most is for you to stop the pain and live.

Best Answer

Related Questions