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...when you bring it up with them? You know, so it doesn't turn into yelling, crying, or worse yet both.
Beksinski Beksinski 22-25, F 6 Answers Jul 16, 2012

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You need to chill out and cool down before, sort out the ob<x>jective motives for anger from personal grievances they're not responsible for.

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Yeah, I got that. I'm just finding that it's easier said than done so it's the how I'm needing help with. I'm really grouchy over it.

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You could imagine you're a third party, your friend or a stranger.

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maybe I'll ask a third party, friend, or stranger. Thanks :) !

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Don't concentrate on the problem as much as finding a solution?

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Yeah, that might work. Thanks

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If you yell at them you already lost the arguement

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Yeah, that's why I need to cool down and be reasonable and objective and not yell. Or cry. Any hints?

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meditation and being able too call on it when you need it. deep breaths. a few seconds on responses too regain composure before answering or asking them. It can be difficult when first learning to control the emotions :S

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Thanks, great advice. I do meditate, I just don't want to get emotional when I bring it up again, because yeah, as soon as you're emotionally invested you've lost.

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The best answer I've found is watch your breathing. If its fast and short - LEAVE. You're not ready. When you can calm your breathing and your heart rate, you probably won't be any happier, but you'll have a great deal of self control, enough to be ob<x>jective

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sounds like very solid advice, thankyou, I'll try that.

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