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I'm a 16 year old girl, currently in college, soon 17. I've fallen in love with a 35 year old, what should i do?

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37 Answers to "I'm a 16 year old girl, currently in college, soon 17. I've fallen in love with a 35 year old, what should i do?"

  1. milander - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by milander Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:11PM

    end the relationship..

    Like (6)

  2. msbee16 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by msbee16 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:42PM

    It's not easy. I've tried that... I just become sad and lonely and end up coming back.

    Like (1)

  3. milander - 41-45 years old - male

    Reply by milander Jun 14th, 2012 at 1:21AM

    You have to end it, find someone your age. At 35 he's moved from the fun but not young adult into the nearly middle aged adult. It will get more difficult for you, he will get a lot of flak for having such a young girlfriend to the extent that it could easily affect your social life and his work life plus at your age you need to be thinking about University/college. At your age now you are making decisions that will affect the rest of your life (education, career), he's already made them. If you make the wrong ones you will regret it for the rest of your life. I know girls who gave up on Uni because they were in love and he was going to be the man of their life.. it ended, they couldn't go to Uni and now at least one of them is in drug rehab and the other one I keep in touch with is a 34 year old waitress who basically flushed her life down the toilet. It's not right. End the relationship for your own sake.

    Like (1)

    1 more reply
  4. 5hadow - 51-55 years old

    Posted by 5hadow Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:09PM

    put you nose back in the books and forget about the creep!

    Like (6)

  5. Sacron11 - 46-50 years old - male

    Posted by Sacron11 Jun 13th, 2012 at 8:23PM

    There's something wrong with the guy. You may feel 'mature,' but trust me, you're not. And a 35 year old who's 'in love' or 'infatuated' or whatever has problems. Probably serious insecurity and lack of social skills. You can't see that. That's why you interest him.
    Do what you want, but try to inject bit of rational brainpower into your emotions.

    Like (4)

  6. Timb1 - 22-25 years old - male

    Posted by Timb1 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:16PM

    In the u.k college starts at 16. vocational qualification or an apprenticeship? And is free.university Starts at 18. Get it. And use birth countrol

    Like (4)

  7. Timb1 - 22-25 years old - male

    Reply by Timb1 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:14PM

    use birth countrol

    Like (1)

  8. msbee16 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by msbee16 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:28PM

    I have no sexual experience and don't plan to engage sexually for a few more years yet.

    Like (1)

  9. Delilah5 - 56-60 years old - female

    Posted by Delilah5 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:10PM

    In a word? RUN. Do not pass go and do not collect 200 bucks. You'll get over it.

    Like (4)

  10. fourthtot - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by fourthtot Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:09PM

    I do not believe that you are 16 and in college.

    Like (4)

  11. lostsoulswillfindtheirwayhome - 22-25 years old - female

    Reply by lostsoulswillfindtheirwayhome Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:17PM

    In some countries, college starts that early.

    Like (1)

  12. msbee16 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by msbee16 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:20PM

    I live in the Uk. Things are different here. In the UK highschool is called College.

    Like (1)

    1 more reply
  13. kryptorchid - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by kryptorchid Oct 10th, 2012 at 6:08PM

    Don't listen to these idiots, I'm 27 and dating a 16 year old. I'm not a perv, she pursued me first and I struggled with the age difference at first. But eventually I gave up and realized age is just a number and love is love. She is very sweet and I care for her deeply and I know she feels the same way.

    Like (3)

  14. TinkerBell12344 - 18-21 years old

    Posted by TinkerBell12344 Jun 15th, 2012 at 6:03PM

    to be fair, age is just a number, and I know that's what you wanna hear, that's why you asked this question. In reality though, no one can decide what you wanna do but you. No one on here slagging your man off knows him or your relationship, but that could be the exact reason you need to be cautious (and men are men, and will have sexual desires whether you intend to have sex before marriage or not. Its mother nature were talking about). There's always two sides to any argument... weigh up what you feel. you don't need the opinion of others to decide what YOU want.

    Like (3)

  15. AaronMountainOfStrength - 18-21 years old

    Posted by AaronMountainOfStrength Jun 13th, 2012 at 8:07PM

    Run for the ******* hillz!! O_o Ok ok ok, I'll get serious, just watch yourself.

    Like (3)

  16. msbee16 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by msbee16 Jun 13th, 2012 at 8:27PM

    I see you like naruto xD Off topic, but i cant help notice your pic. 4th hokage. x

    Like (1)

  17. AaronMountainOfStrength - 18-21 years old

    Reply by AaronMountainOfStrength Jun 13th, 2012 at 8:32PM

    Thanks, I suppose you're a Naruto fan, let's be friends! :D

    Like (1)

    2 more replies
  18. FlauntTheImperfections - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by FlauntTheImperfections Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:11PM

    WAIT. You are probably just infatuated with him. Give yourself time to let your brain catch up with your heart. When you are 36 he will be a geriatric 65 and ready to retire. Is that really the relationship you want.

    Like (3)

  19. msbee16 - 16-17 years old - female

    Reply by msbee16 Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:32PM

    I have known him for about 6 months.

    Like (1)

  20. ashping095 - 18-21 years old

    Posted by ashping095 Dec 31st, 2012 at 1:37PM

    okay, i'm 18 , i'm studying in a big university, and i think i've fall in love with a 30 yr old man, actually he's my department guidance councilor. I like him, and i discover that he likes me too. But i think we still have to wait, don't rush on everything, if he really loves you he will wait, remember though it sounds really chessy ., good things happen for those people who wait.

    Like (2)

  21. LonexWolf - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by LonexWolf Jun 13th, 2012 at 8:50PM

    Finding someone your age whom you can relate to will bring you a happier relationship. And I'm guessing this guy will lose his job/wife/freedom from jail if he went for you, so don't go for it. Yeah, that relationship would be a tad illegal, and I think you know that. Love is when you know someone so intimately you don't have to speak and they know what you mean, and vice versa. You're not in love, you have a crush or are infatuated.

    Like (2)

  22. ProvidentialParlance - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by ProvidentialParlance Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:51PM

    You are not in love, you are infatuated. It feels very potent and powerful. You think it's love and it's very close, but it's not. In this you cathect your partner, which is where you give lots of energy and focus on the object. You can cathect anything though, such as your car. If you cathect your car you'd probably wax it weekly, and keep it clean.

    In time this will fade and you'll be met with a choice to truly love him or not. Because he's so much older I'd suggest you end it. You'll feel pain, and a lot of it, but it's better for you.

    Like (2)

  23. whowasthatmaskedman - 56-60 years old - male

    Posted by whowasthatmaskedman Jun 13th, 2012 at 7:09PM

    Absolutely nothing!!! Anything else will land him in major trouble with your family or the law.

    Like (2)

  24. PreetiSandeep - 18-21 years old

    Posted by PreetiSandeep May 20th, 2013 at 6:46AM

    I am a 19 year old boy and love for you please you love me this is my serious reguest please yes and no reply to my mobile no. 08146046886

    Like (1)

  25. DDogs - 18-21 years old

    Posted by DDogs Feb 3rd, 2013 at 3:43AM

    Lol I'm late and the problem is probably solved already but it was interesting reading all the responses

    Like (1)

  26. bel1000x - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by bel1000x Dec 26th, 2012 at 11:43AM

    so what happened? it had been months.. i used to be in the same situation like yours.. i thought i was in love.. but all there really was is sex.. STOP it if it havent ended yet. You might say youre in love right now, that he's the right guy, NO, you deserve someone better and trust me THERE IS.

    Like (1)

  27. Minna0725 - 16-17 years old - female

    Posted by Minna0725 Dec 25th, 2012 at 7:46PM

    I understand where you are coming from. I am also 16 and like a 33 year old man who sadly happens to be my manager. Its confusing and hard. in your case I would ignore what people say and go for the relationship, but not to fast. when your all done with highschool or college maybe take it a little more serious and if things are still amazing after university then go from there, just dont make any huge decisions while you are in school. school comes first no matter what if he is getting in your way then he doesnt really care for you. hope that helped a little. ~~^^

    Like (1)

  28. hillbillycrone - 51-55 years old - female

    Posted by hillbillycrone Dec 10th, 2012 at 2:33PM

    You cannot help it ..I realize this, and the reason that you cannot help it is because you are not physically finished maturing yet. Seriously, while you have the body of a mature female, the frontal lobe of your brain will not be finished maturing for several more years. You are supposed to fall in love easily now and become infatuated easily now, and make romantic mistakes and learn from them now, it's part of the human process..just know that any 35 year old man that has a serious romantic interest in a young woman your age, isn't a wise choice for someone your age, he lacks maturity (and he should be fully baked so perhaps it's his morals?) His age gives him a great advantage over you and he can easily manipulate you. I married a man that was 25 when I was 16...BAD IDEA, by the time I was 24 I was an entirely different person and of course the marriage dissolved then. Do what you have to do but don't be as silly as I was. Most of all do not confuse sexual feelings with falling in love, those are two different monkeys.

    Like (1)

  29. Koaru18 - 18-21 years old

    Posted by Koaru18 Nov 28th, 2012 at 9:54PM

    I met my boyfriend who was (26) when I was 16 in 2010, exactly after a huge breakup, wasn't really looking forward to dating anyone but at one event I met my future fiancée, (I'm 18 now , about to study fashion in Singapore ) when I first met him, he wansn't really what I say my type, he was shorter than me, I'm about 164 cm ( 5'5) but then he asked me out and he was such a gentle man , I became to start liking him ( a bit as I was cautios) on that very first date , I can actually see my future being with him, meaning to say he was the one for me , and I said " hmm maybe his not that bad" it turns I was right, every single time we be going on a date he will ask my mom for permission, my mom likes him so does my dad since both are geeks, it's been 3 years now I've dating him, age doesn't really stop you to like someone, but follow my advice what I did when I was ur age, get to know him better and don't make rash desicion , and if he really sincere and he gives u his trust you need to give back that trust too, I wish u luck my dear

    Like (1)

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