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This summer, and old friend and I were reunited. Then, he was given an opportunity to move to my city. We had both decided to entertain the possibility of "us". He decided to move to my city. To save money we agreed to move in together. The day I moved in, I knew the relationship felt wrong. I tried to leave, but he cried, made me feel horrible for convincing him to move to be with me and told me to try to make it work. Well, it's been four months, and I've done everything I thought would make me happy. We work out together, cook meals together, save money, go dancing, even go to church (and he's an atheist!) But, I don't call my friends. I don't even talk to my mom. I cry at night. We live together. He loves me. He doesn't want me to leave. I feel like I can't. I'm 23 and I want to get married (potentially, someday, but can this work?) and marriage is all about compromise, but is it really this miserable? Please help.
mimsykins mimsykins 22-25 15 Answers Jan 4, 2013 in Struggles

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Tie up all of your legal matters right now, like your rental agreement. Pack your bags, take a deep breath, and go. Don't live your life for someone else. He loves you? Great. Then he should know how selfish he is being, locking you up like a butterfly in a jar or something. You are a human being. You belong in a happy, healthy relationship. You DESERVE that. Don't feel sorry for someone who DEFINITELY isn't feeling sorry for you. Think about you, and your life. Do what's best for YOU. How do you leave? You grab your stuff and run as fast as you can. I would cut communication with him, too, if you feel any sort of reluctance to face him afterwards. There are very unhinged people in relationships that do dangerous things when they feel like they are losing the person they are dependent on.

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His tears now are better than lifelong tears for you both and any possible children that might happen along in the future. Just do it! You also don't know if his tears are truly about you or if they're about his ego. I just told my husband today that I don't want to live in the same house with him anymore. We're not getting divorced, but he has agreed to move out in a few months when he can get a contract out of the area. He came back into the room crying and telling me how much he loves me. He loves me so much he's willing to leave to make me happy -- and then he tells me that he already told his contract finder a week or two ago to look for a job for him out of state at the end of February. Just proving once again, that he's not so much in love with me as he cares about protecting his ego in not having another "failed" marriage. Well I'd say we're pretty well failed. Sorry, I just realized I turned this into my venting and not about your question, but it does apply, if you are that miserable it makes sense to leave sooner than later.

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You have to be strong and leave....you could end up spending your whole life doing what everyone wants of you, at the cost of your own happiness

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with courage and willingness. and if you dont have that pray for the willingness to have both of those things.

the main thing is that you are not happy. so leave. just think: you have been without him once and you can do it again. and life will be better. because you will be stronger going over this hurdle.

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Just leave and don't let him try to control you with guilt.

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Communication is key.

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If he loves you, then he shoukd realize that smothering you is the best thing to do

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What exactly is the issue? You won't know what to do unless you find out, and such problems may persist with other guys too. Ask yourself- if it's not him, what is it? It may be something only you can solve.

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leave quickly and secretly..........

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lololo i was thinking to say the same thing omg open the front door and walk out

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The front door

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