In disgust mom says I am like dad and dad says I am like mom, does this mean I am only made of their bad?
9 Answers to "In disgust mom says I am like dad and dad says I am like mom, does this mean I am only made of their bad?"
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don't let this stuff get to you...when angry my dad says that i'm like my grandma, which is very hurtful,knowing how much he hates her.
but keep your chin up, and know that they are wrong about you!Like (1)
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thanks! I do my best you have those days though you know. my parents are just so mean to each other. It makes me wonder how did they ever once love each other?
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there really is a fine line between love and hate..and people do change and it can become hard to love somebody who you used to love before. it sounds sad, but you just have to keep strong and learn from their mistakes too ;)
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We all look in morror and see person looking back. qeution comes up who am I. Will I be like my father or my mother in ther actions or will I be my own person. What person will that be that why we look morror for answer for we may never know. just have to take it day by day
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Thanks!! I like to think I am a well balance of the two. Everyone has flaws so I would never consider myself perfect but it can be hurtful at times for sure.
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My parents did the same thing, dragging each other's skeletons out and all. They divirced when I was three and the hate never stopped until they were both dead.
Their strategy backfired: I believed them both.Like (1)
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My father tries to lie about stuff as if I didnt see them with my own two eyes. I seriously think he thinks I am just stupid and that I cannot figure it out on my own. Who knows I am probably really dramatic. Lol. My mother on the other hand most of the time I just feel sorry for her becaue the betrayel was more then I could have handled. Honestly he didn't do the things to me but they were still very hurtful to me.
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Just a couple of days ago, I told my daughter this: I look a lot like both of my parents, and sometimes when my mither looked at me I could see that I remend her so much of my dad it was sometimes difficult to resist hating me. She was that bitter. And she (my daughter) looks so much like both my wife and I it reminds me of how much we loved each other when we brought her into the world, and never to forget that. My wife and I are on the brink of splitting up, so I wanted her to understand how much we both love her and how she is living proof of the love we once had, and no matter how bitter or angry I am about her mother I will never equate her with my bitterness.
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no, it just means they're too self-centred to be nice to you
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I do think there is alot of selfishness going on there.
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Unfortunately, much as we don't want to be like our parents we pretty much do copy them as they are all we see when very young and they teach us up to about age 5.
Look at it in computer terms. A computer comes with hard coded instructions, right. You can add programs and remove them as you wish. But changing that hard coding is for experts only and that is what changing what you learnt as a child is like. It IS hard coded and so hard to overcome. I still haven't done so at age 61. I know what most of it is but can I change it? Not a chance. It's so automatic I have learn to live with and around those things.
An example? I was taught never to be late, always be early or dead on time. Stressed to me so often I feared being late and still, today I always turn up early at whatever meeting or appointment I have. If it looks like I am going to be late as soon as the alotted time arrives it seems a bell goes off and I start panicking. Yes, docs and shrinks have talked with me about it and I know it doesn' usually matter. But it does to me.
As a manager of 35 people when I held a meeting I gave them the time the meeting was to commence and that's when I started the neeting. If anyone turned up late I told them to go away or just locked the door. I just cannot stand one person holding everyone else up sothey penaise themselves. Others tolerate it and waste everyone's day.
Try understandingwhat it is that makes yu ike them and try working on changing that. Good luck.Like (1)
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This is actually something I think about alot. There are things that are inate and you cannot change maybe the things my mom hates and my dad hate are inate? It is hard cause I want my parents to not hate being around me. I am old enough and have my own life going on that it shouldn't really matter but man it does. FYI I cannot tolerate people being late. Things happen totally get that but some people do not regard others and how important their time is to them.
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I think you got it. You have picked those sorts of things up from your parents. They usually try and give us good messages, or what they believe is good. But they forget we also pick up on their behaviour and absorb that too. Yeah that late thing I agree with but it can dominate me when it shouldn't. Cannot stop it. There are other things too I just can't overcome but at least I know what they are and where they came from. I know my mother tried to teach me all the etiquette type things from the early part of last century. But most of them have little relevance today. My father, he was a very spiteful man who ran every one down behind their backs. So you knew if you weren't there then you were getting stabbed. And over nothing. He feigned love but really didn't like or know how to deal with any children. He didn't know how to play and was always pushing the education barrow. Which caused me to deliberately do as badly as I could to avoid further study. He turned me against any authority and I still reject what an authority says first and then try to work out what is right.Today I think that was a great result for me because I am opposite to most people who just accept and do what they are told. I go the opposite way every time, thanks to my father's attempts to push me where he wanted me to go. They are things we must learn about before we can live with them. I don't know if they can be changed as they are so deeply a part of me and you too. all people I suspect.
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NO Kid...it means their angry and hurt people, hurt people....there not thinking about how it makes you feel. Your a little of both of them, good and bad. Shake it off,,,Im sorry those words came out of you parents mouths.
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They are definitely angry and most of the time it comes out when I don't do something their way or do agree. They are not very good parents when it comes to that they are kind of selfish and what hurts them they take out on me cause I take it.
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it means you shouldnt listen to your parents when they are fighting
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They don't talk they have been divorced for over 14 years but they say that to me still when they are disgusted. It is hurtful and how do you get disgusted with your child?
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I'm sorry :( that isn't cool at all. In all honesty though, a lot of people take out their anger on the wrong (available) person, which in this case is you. When my parents try this sort of stuff I tell them that I dont want to hear it...if they have a beef with someone else they should go talk to them and leave me out of it. (it is usually between my parents and sister). Because you can generally tell when it is actually about you, and when it is really them -- either way it sucks though and I think you should gently tell them this. It doesnt have to be excessively confrontational ..just tell them how you feel
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It means they have issues with each other. lol
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That makes total sense I am at the age it shouldn't matter but why do they have to be so hateful to each other. Blek
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Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):
Posted by crabby24 Nov 16th, 2012 at 5:42PM
No your stuck in the middle.
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Reply by CopperBlaze Nov 16th, 2012 at 6:18PM
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Reply by crabby24 Nov 16th, 2012 at 8:31PM
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