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Inviting his ex and my friend to our wedding? I'm a bit stuck here. Thanks.

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Asked By: CorruptedAngel 22-25, F  2 months ago

It's a tough one I know, but I committed a dating no-no and dated a friend's ex. At the time it was very difficult and she and I fell out. But her ex (my now fiancé) worked in the same office as me so we sort of knew one another. Fate had it's plans and 18 months after they split up things blossomed between he and me. Some 6 years later we're now 2 months away from our wedding. My Mum rang me this afternoon for a catch-up and she told me his ex had visited (she's very friendly with my family) and she was asking about our wedding. My Mum went on to tell me how she was reflecting on the things we did growing up and some of her favourite memories, and I kinda wanted my friend to be there at our wedding. What happened, happened. The only one with any grudges is my fiancé. Everyone else is very civil and friendly. I've already told my fiancé if I invited her it'd be to the reception only as the ceremony is an immediate family only thing, followed by a larger reception. What do I do? Than

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    Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):

    KayKai - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by KayKai Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:45AM

    It seems like your friend is willing to put the past behind her. Why is your ex not able to? It's his day too, so I would respect his wishes, but certainly he can be the bigger man and let things go.

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  1. CorruptedAngel - 22-25 years old - female

    Reply by CorruptedAngel Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:47AM

    This is true, and I remember the night she rang me and said she felt like she wanted to split from him. She was actually quite upset but I do also know he called her a heartless b*tch, something I think was a) uncalled for and b) uncharacteristic of him.

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  2. KayKai - 26-30 years old - female

    Reply by KayKai Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:50AM

    You should tell him that you intend on clearing the air. It sounds like you still want to be friends with her, and he doesn't have to like her or interact with her at the party but you'd like her there.

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3 Answers to "Inviting his ex and my friend to our wedding? I'm a bit stuck here. Thanks."

  1. holehearted79 - 31-35 years old - female

    Posted by holehearted79 Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:59AM

    Exs should not be invited regardless of friendship. Especially if your fiance is no OK with it.

    Like (1)

  2. Messyah - 41-45 years old - male

    Posted by Messyah Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:48AM

    Your fiance's wishes should be the ones being honored for the wedding.

    Your after wedding reception would be one where you n fiance both compromise.

    Like (1)

  3. CorruptedAngel - 22-25 years old - female

    Reply by CorruptedAngel Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:49AM

    Precisely, no way was I going to invite her to the ceremony as that's a very personal and intimate thing. But the reception after is essentially just a party.

    Like (1)

  4. Messyah - 41-45 years old - male

    Reply by Messyah Mar 10th, 2013 at 9:50AM

    Then looks like you've already got it covered. My fear would be the ex trying to come back in the picture.

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