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well the guy is 23 yrs old he is really nice to me, respectful, never asks for anything that makes me uncomfortable, and wants to meet my parents, and we are not dating yet.... he wants to try dating,but he wants to do things right without hiding our relationship... he also has a 3 yr old daughter that i love and loves me.... i dont know what the right thing to do is...i am also scared my parents wont approve of it..... any help???
amor14 amor14 13-15, F 116 Answers May 29, 2012

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Yes a 23 year old man is too old for you. If I was your father, you would already be visiting his grave.

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I'll help you dig one, King

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Thank you Ruby. I know Wilde has not seen this question because if she had she would have already dug the hole for this "baby rapping bastard" to be buried in.

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You got that right. Oh my word.

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Well said sir

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Amor14, I am wondering how you met a 23 year old man to have several unsupervised conversations with? What are you supposed to do with his three-year old daughter? Play dress up? She isn't a toy.<br />
<br />
While I do understand the attraction of an older man, he is just that, a man. You are still a child. If you were my daughter you wouldn't be allowed to date until you were at least 16 years old and that would only be with boys around your age.<br />
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This man could go to jail for statutory rape and there is nothing you can do about it. Not even your parents could stop that. That is something that is handled by the law. I'm know that I would go "ape" if I found out my barely-teenaged daughter was having conversations with an adult man. I hate to say it this way but you are not Brooke Shields and this is not "Pretty Baby".<br />
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I am disgusted that a man would even think it would be OK to talk to you and want to meet your parents to date you. This pervert needs to find another adult to have conversations with. Contributing to the delinquency of a minor is not something a man wants to have on his record.

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You hit all the right questions. What in world is this? A 23 year old man should know better! This guy is sick.

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No offense to you at all but some guys only go after girls your age because some girls your age can still be naive enough to not be able to see the red flags in a man's personality that a more experienced woman would able to spot from a mile away. It sounds alluring but chances are he's got more baggage than Delta Airlines... Not worth it.

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Also, if he is on the same emotional/mental wavelength with a person your age, chances are there is also something very wrong with him. Don't even think twice about losers like him. Nothing good ever comes of these kinds of situations.

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nice troll *pats head*.....

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He is to old for you. The funny thing is that if you were both 10 or even 6 or 7 years older he wouldnt be. You see, you are now at 2 very different Stages in your life. You havent given yourself time to totally become the grownup that you decide to be. That person may not even have anything at all in common with this man especially if you feel that you do right now at your present age. There is a whole world of changes that you will go through in the next few years. Give yourself the freedom to grow in the way that you choose without having to expierience the pain of feeling yourself growing away from this man and the pain that will cause his child as well. If, after you have gone through all the changes ahead for you, after you are through your school years and enter the adult world, you still feel yourself drawn to this man, That would be the time to pursue it. If it is true love, it will not die, he Will still be there. Dont ever settle for less.

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Like most everyone before me has already said, YES! While you may not understand it now, if you give yourself time to grow and NOT date this guy, when you are 23 you will see why a relationship with a 15 is disgusting (and understandably illegal). The fact that he already has a child and is pursuing you is a huge red flag. RUN. Give yourself a chance to dream the dreams you don't even know you have yet. Need motivation? Listen to Taylor Swift's song "Fifteen". While she sings about dating a guy her own age, she also acknowledges she had no idea what dreams lay before her at 15.

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I remember a 14 year old girl asked me the same question. Nothing really got to her - she couldn't understand why it was illegal or why the man was not good for her. The only thing she did understand was this:<br />
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'He is nine years older than you. It would be like you dating a five year old. How would you feel about a 14 year old dating a five year old?'

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i hope youre a troll. but just in case you're not, yes, that is wrong. very wrong.

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Okay, don't take this the wrong way.. nothing against you, I'm sure you're awesome. But for a 23 year old guy to like a 14 year old girl more than a friend... it shows that he hasn't grown up yet, that he is immature. He's just going to try to control everything you do, though you won't realize it at first. He had the upper hand because he's older, and what he says will go, above what you really want. I assume you are not fully "developed" yet either... so it's leaning toward ********* behavior on his part.

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Yes he is way old.He has a mans needs. You are a teenager and vulnerable.My friend did this. Married him at 16. She had 3 babies and he left her.She was forcwd to be a single parent. He remarried. He did not help her financially. With no education she became a bartender.The children have issues that will probably never be resolved.Enough said.

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why not tell the police of this and send him to jail for a while so he will not think it is ok to try and date a child oh I forget you do not think you are a child

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Hi sweetie, I am now 33 and have been through soooooo much hurt, pain, and junk in my life. When I was 13 I started chasing after guys and never stopped until Jesus Christ captured my heart forever and ever. I dated lots of OLDER guys. Including a very much older guy (twice my age) and lot of guys my own age. Even 1 guy a little younger than me. So I know ALL about what you are considering. He seems really nice and he seems kind and you admire him. You might even be attracted to him physically already. BUT, put the BRAKES on as fast as you can and leave them there. The wonderful thing about life, is that waiting and stopping will never do you wrong. NEVER. You can always sit back and think things through and believe me you won't miss a THING. Wait till you are older to look to men and guys. Wait, wait, wait, wait. God has plan for you and He won't leave you alone. So let the guys go play Halo and football and leave them alone until you are SURE of yourself, sure of your own heart, and sure you are wise enough to dive into romance without any nasty baggage and regrets from those tough teen years.

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yes i totally agree with you.....

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COMING FROM EXPERIENCE: at 16 I dated a 24 year old. All that time I thought he was so nice. But then, he wanted me to do drugs with him and weird sexual fantasies. I thought staying with him would prove I don't judge, but looking back I think how creepy it is that he was even interested. I thought I wanted a "man" but no man would want a little girl without a hidden agenda. For all you know he could have an STD that doesn't show symptoms and easily pass it on when you're young and naive. Please, run!!!

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lyrics to Young Girl / Gary Puckett & The Union Gap<br />
<br />
Gary Puckett and The Union Gap<br />
Young Girl<br />
<br />
Young girl, get out of my mind<br />
My love for you is way out of line<br />
Better run, girl,<br />
You're much too young, girl<br />
With all the charms of a woman<br />
You've kept the secret of your youth<br />
You led me to believe<br />
You're old enough<br />
To give me Love<br />
And now it hurts to know the truth, Oh,<br />
Beneath your perfume and make-up<br />
You're just a baby in disguise<br />
And though you know<br />
That it is wrong to be<br />
Alone with me<br />
That come on look is in your eyes, Oh,<br />
So hurry home to your mama<br />
I'm sure she wonders where you are<br />
Get out of here<br />
Before I have the time<br />
To change my mind<br />
'Cause I'm afraid we'll go too far, Oh,<br />
Young girl<br />
<br />
Young girl, get out of my mind<br />
My love for you is way out of line<br />
Better run, girl,<br />
You're much too young, girl<br />
With all the charms of a woman<br />
You've kept the secret of your youth<br />
You led me to believe<br />
You're old enough<br />
To give me Love<br />
And now it hurts to know the truth, Oh,<br />
Beneath your perfume and make-up<br />
You're just a baby in disguise<br />
And though you know<br />
That it is wrong to be<br />
Alone with me<br />
That come on look is in your eyes, Oh,<br />
So hurry home to your mama<br />
I'm sure she wonders where you are<br />
Get out of here<br />
Before I have the time<br />
To change my mind<br />
'Cause I'm afraid we'll go too far, Oh,<br />
Young girl<br />
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoZlIHGYmi4

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Please stay away from him that is against the law. Find someone your age.<br />
and live your life...<br />
Heres a I have a boyfriend thats 12 years old he doesnt want to do the things I want to sometimes. If we sit down to watch something he falls a sleep. I still want to go out but hes done all of that so hes not to keen on going off to a club for a while... Even though were older when we met its the same.<br />
lets say hes 23 right he can get in clubs and pretend to be at work while your home wondering where he is. Your way tooooo young live your life your young embrace it.

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1 it's illegal 2 it's stupid 3 your father would probably kill him

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It is illegal. Go for guys your age. He will go to jail and his poor daughter, that you claim to love, will be in foster care because lord knows you are not old enough to take care of a child. You are just a child yourself!

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seriously - you already know the answer. Yes he is too old for you. He has issues and ou will too if you don't make some changes in your life. Where are your parents? Gett away from him - get some help!

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I'm thinking you might actually be that 23 year old guy posing as the 14 year old to hear our opinions on what we think of you. I hope you change your mind after reading all of the comments :)

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He has a kid and he wants to date a fourteen old? What a mental dumb-***!

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