i still have feelings for my ex, and want to tell them i miss them, but they don't say it back, and have already moved on. is this bad? does it seem desperate or pathetic?
meeeese meeeese 26-30 10 Answers Aug 21, 2010

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I went to your site and read the story, and based on what I've read, YES!!!!! It's really, really sad, but your ex is a player who wanted his cake and eat it too. He went back to his ex, he has made his choice, and YES you would look completely spineless and pathetic if you told this rotten man that you miss him after he dumped you to go back to his EX and they are HAPPY and you are MISERABLE and he is having wonderful SEX with HER and NOT with YOU because HE MADE THE CHOICE to DUMP you. I would hate his guts forever if he did that to me, and maybe you should try to remember that he didn't WANT you, and try to find a man who actually is worth something, and is deserving of your love, and won't go two-timing you with his EX. OOOOO that whole thing makes me so mad on your behalf. You hate HER???? HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!

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What is your purpose? Is it to try to win him back? If so, there is nothing wrong with that but, if it were me, and I wanted to win back my former guy, I would think about it and come up with a "battle plan," a long term one, and make a serious attempt.

If you want him back, why make a feeble, impulsive emotional attempt to get him to respond? You have already indicated he is not responding now; do you have any reason to think he would?

If you don't want him back, what would be the purpose of making a sentimental comment about your feelings for him? You would be setting yourself up for rejection. It would probably annoy him and hurt you. I can't see it bringing anything positive about unless it was part of a consciously thought out plan to get him back.

One part of a good plan to get him back would be letting him have some time without you. It's like that old Dan Hicks song: "How Can I Miss You When You Won't Go Away?" Sometimes, when one person backs off, the other steps forward, kind of like a dance. Maybe you just need to figure out how to get him to take his step in the dance and move toward you.

If you want him back, figure out an intelligent plan to get him back and put yourself out there and make the attempt. You'd risk rejection, of course, but at least you would have given it a good, serious try.

Otherwise, if you don't want him back, and he has moved on, don't prolong your suffering. Resign yourself to missing him for a while.. Just let it be. If he doesn't want you, you are truly better off without him and, if you are patient and give it some time, you will see that is true.

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Honestly, I don't see the point of saying it if they're not going to say it back. I mean really what do you gain? You say I miss you, he says okay...thanks... it will be awkward for you both, I'm sorry but its the truth.

If you really need to say it, write him a letter or text...but don't send it!! Give it a week or so and then read it again and ask yourself if you still feel that way. If you do, give it another week. If not, laugh at what you saved yourself from and tear it up. Screw him if he's moved on, he'll never do better than you!

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No i dont think its bad. you hve to express your feelings even if the other person doesnt feel the same

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i think that if you plan on going back to the ex, then maybe. however, if not-- i would try to let it go and let them be. it could end up being really painful for either or both of you.

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Well, if you expect them to say it back, then it's a problem. However, if it is the truth for you, then what's bad about it?

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I think the Truth is usually the best bet. But you have to be prepared to be hurt when your feeling is not mutual. That's the sucky part. It also could be that they do feel it too but are just guarded, or wise, or whatever and they keep it to themselves. All that stuff is too complicated for me. In my ideal world, only the Truth would fly. And it would not be easy, but it would be reliable and unchanging. ~ Clearly they want to move on. (Especially if it's the woman to the guy I think), telling him once goes a VERY LONG way; don't do it again, or soon. Otherwise, yes, it would be construed as weak and possibly pathetic. Not good for you :-(. I hope some of this makes some sense at least.

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