I think that maybe trying to communicate your dis-satisfaction is a good first step. Tell him what you're feeling and missing and ask him to make some time for you. If he doesn't want to consider counseling for both of you preferably, but if he won't then go alone and ask for professional help so that you can figure out what will make you happy.
You are already alone.
Tell your husband - you miss him. alot.
Sometimes men like this need a tweeking, dress up like crazy and tell him your going out to dinner...alone. Would he like to accompany you?
as marilyn monroe says, "it's better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone." but it's marriage, maybe things can still be fixed.
"I guess there are worse" sounds like you are settling for what's "OK" instead of going for the real thing. Don't you want to be with someone who will give you an actual place in his life?.
You are obviously not in the kind of life/relationship you want to be in. For how much longer do you think you will be ok with it. 5 years? 10? 15?.
Think about it
Get a pool boy. Your jackass husband can afford it.
It's better to be in a relationship where things are partly okay. Your brain's limbic system needs feedback from another person to keep your bodily functions properly. It's lack of the same thats's why old spouses so often follow each other to the grave. I fear that no one gets all their needs met, but people who are alone waste away. Children and especially infants have actually died from loneliness in great number in what's called "failure to thrive".
The answer is individual. For myself - no I'm not ok with that at this point. And,, for me, I've learned that someone can DO some THINGS (taking out trash, bringing home a paycheck, etc. ) but that's not what I need out of a relationship - the word RELATE is in there & it sounds like that's not there. Othe than the sex life - do you guys talk? Share feelings, dreams, goals whatever? Do you feel close? If someone isn't really close to me - WITH me - then I don't feel there IS a 'relationship'. Maybe some couples counseling will help boost you back together.
But ultimately the question is , what do you want for YOU??
hugs, & good luck!
As long as he doesn't mind you sleeping with someone else, discreetly, what more could you want? ( Especially if you got pregnant by the other guy!)