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i cant help but notice that my bf doesn't seem to have trouble at all when it comes to new male friends, me on the other hand, I find it quite difficult to make girl friends. A group of girls in work are quite a bitchy bunch and I have been left out on a few social occasions, I have tried to be friendly but i think its a lost cause. i feel like they are more uncomfortable around me than other female colleagues. Why is this? Why cant girls just be normal!!
monkeymoos monkeymoos 70+ 7 Answers Jan 17, 2013 in Parenting & Family

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No, its harder in their 30s -_-

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One thing I've noticed about making new female friends in my 30's vs 20's is a lot of the snobbier 20-something women kind of get that chip knocked off their shoulder by the time they're 30-40 or so and calm down with the "better than everyone" attitudes. So that can be cool.

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Lol, yeah I'm not as much of a jerk as I used to be despite what people see on this site from me

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I think it depends more on personalities than age or gender.<br />
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My ex husband had new friends all of the time. We moved to a new city and he instantly made all of these new friends, at work and other places. <br />
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I am a very pleasant, positive, upbeat person...but I just don't let people "in" as quickly and don't click with other women that much. It takes a LOT for me to make a real friend. I have plenty of friendly acquaintances, and I'll go to lunch with my female coworkers and have a nice time...but it generally ends there, and that's ok with me. I like other women in general but most of my close friends are women I've known since high school (and I'm 36)!<br />
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I do think gender CAN play a role, though. My ex and I were childfree by choice (as I still am) and a lot of women are moms and tend to gravitate toward fellow moms for various reasons. Men don't seem to bond over children nearly as much. I think that's been a MAJOR obstacle for me in making friends, and it has worked both ways...when I meet a new woman I am not as interested in hanging out with her if it involves kids, either.

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yes true, personality is very important and compatibility

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I don't think so, its all about confedance

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Yes, it is very yes to make guy "friends"

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do you know why they are uncomfortable with you? It might be a situation you can change if you are good at subtle manipulation.

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No not really, there are 3 of them i get on well with one of them but the other two....its like they don't want anyone else getting in their group. I have discussed this with my bf and he puts it down to them seeing me as some kind of threat. One of them in particular has a face like a slapped ar$e alot of the time. But is really bugs me why they are like it

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I don't think you can blame it on being a woman or in a certain age group. While I don't know you or your personality, the responsibility of being friendly or making friends is solely on you. Every person is different. Some make friends easily, while others take time to open up to others. It isn't about being a specific age or gender, but it is about your own personality or inhibition. I suggest taking a look at your approach to others, and determining whether or not you might be the reason why this is hard.

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I am in the same boat. Girls are trickier and I try my best, but can't stand pettiness

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