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melissamel melissamel 36-40, F 19 Answers Jun 7, 2011

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Personally facing them and accepting them as a part of my life and of myself helped me grow out of my past. I also expressed the things I felt in the form of artwork. I did a lot of art. I also took a lot of time thinking about it but forcing myself to step outside of the picture and look at it from another perspective. It's not good to avoid the memories because they might reappear at a time where you are more vulnerable. I had to face mine when I was ready and I grew a lot from doing so.

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I have done all that and keep a level head but these memories just keep commong back and blocking me. I too used to paint and write and those skills have just been quashed. I want them back! :(

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they can't disappear... I had to accept my past and it does once in a while come up but I am at peace with the bad memories I know they are behind me ...have you ever tried confrontation ...it doesn't have to be with literal it can be a mental confrontation

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MyExoticKarma is right about this. I tried for so long to run from my past but it just caught up to me when I stopped running. I had to turn around and face them head on and the truth was ugly and it shook me to the core. I am now at rest with a lot of it now. I even went back to the places where the bad memories took place to confront them. I am glad that I did. Its like putting ghosts to rest where they belong, in the grave. Doing that is setting me free.

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Putting Ghosts in the grave I like that, sounds perfect for what I need

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Forget each and every moment and enjoy the present and think that you are one of the most radiant particle of God

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Well, I personally would love to have my bad memories taken away. But if I were to do that then who would I be. I don't like these memories but these memories are there to stay. I'm ashamed of what I've done in the past and it's hard to face people daily, or complete tasks 'cause of something I remembered. But the thing is you learn from these memories. You learn what to do-What to say- YOu also learn how to overcome obstacles that held you back in your past. But if your still having problems the best thing to do is to make more memories, memories you can say you're proud of. I still have these bad memories but over time these memories that I hated started fading away almost like they never existed.

Hope I was to some assitance. ~ViolaNeko32154.

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I have made bad choices in life! I hurt alot of people! I can't take that back I also can't say sorry! They don't want to hear from me. I don't blame them! I am close to thirty and have no career. I feel like I am failing. I have started a lot but I don't finish it! I need advice to forgive my self! It is very hard to accept love from others! Why?

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we all have a past good the bad and the ugly - share it with others and become a better person. Micheal Jackson try and save the world - no one can do it alone we all must come together and make this world a better place - MJ. connect with www.ananovel.com

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Memories, bad or good, are an intricate part of who we are. Forgetting them means forgetting a part of ourselves, and that is not a good thing to do. In forgetting our past, even a small part of it, we risk losing a small part of what made us the way we are, what forged our psyche and/or physical being into what it is now. To put bad memories behind you, one must be willing to visit those memories, work hard to understand what exactly happened at that time - and why, and then accept the event(s) and subsequent remorse, anger, or joy over those events. History is the past and memories are our way of learning from our history - form our past. Wars are fought and people are injured and killed with abandon, but we have to examine, closely, those wars of the past, and we must work diligently to understand the reasons why they took place. What was at stake and what was not only lost, but gained?

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I agree, sometimes I look back to my past and I wonder how I have ever arrived to where I am today. But the reason i am where i am today is because of those bad memories too. It is a growing experience for sure. Something that use to haunt me and sometimes when my guard is not up, it will come back full force. But i am learning to use them as a tool instead of a crutch. Trying not to let it destroy what i have now. (A Great Husband and 3 Beautiful Kids) Who are growing up sooo fast. It has difently brought out my creativity when I write, I can really express myself and my feelings.

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Well, i think its not possible to get rid of our memories, but at least, we can ignore them, so that we move on.

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Its not possible to erase memorys......

How ever it is possible to remove the power these memorys have over your ego.

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I think you can only change how you react to their existence. Life is harsh and sometimes cruel. I certainly wish I could wipe out memories, but I will settle for finding away for them to not bring me to my knees.

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Ive been wondering this too and they will fade away. Some memories are held onto while others we long to forget. Sometimes we just hold on to the negative memories because they are so hard to let go, but things will get better. =)

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you should write them down on paper it,s a part of the healling but drawing the pichures of what happen or write a peom about it helps a lot.

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I have been using ep to vent

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i didnt get rid of the bad memories but by telling my therapist what happened from my point of view (and having a good cry over things) it doesnt hurt as much when the memories come back up. just say what ever it is, even if its not to someone, say it out loud alone if you like. even by saying it, admitting it, it felt like i accomplished it and it doesnt phase me so much anymore. i hope i helped

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Been to therapy, still cant rid them. I think I knew more than he did anyway!! lol

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Rather than attempt to eradicate the memory, which is difficult, it's better to work through approaches that take the pain and trauma out of the memories. That way, you don't have to try to shut them down, they just no longer have the same effect on you any more. You win. This is trauma counselling, and you can find professionals to help you.



Do it. Take the power back in your life by overcoming this. Doing so will be a great victory of the human spirit.

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meditation hipnoses and aromatherapy oils to clear the mind also talk about them as much as you can get them out of your system it will help you cope better good luck

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Thank you!

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I have never gotten rid of bad memories, but I have never let them define me or control how I live my life, I have learned many valuable lessons, I think those memories have helped me to not only be a better person but a better parent as well.

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So agree with you, lessons definatley learnt! And passed on to my kids too.

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I understand how you feel, and it's so hard to squash bad memories and maybe that's why you are struggling, you want them to go away and they don't so you keep hitting that brick wall over and over, embrace the memories, even if it hurts, glean life lessons out of them then store them in your mental Rolodex, it took me years to deal with bad memories, but if I let them take over I don't just ruin my life, but the lives of my family, I wish you all the luck in the world, message me anytime, I'm always here to help

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