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willowtre willowtre 46-50, F 16 Answers May 26, 2012

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It's definitely your choice and I would do whatever feels more "right" to you. You don't have to explain to anyone why you would or wouldn't. The minute my husband moved out, I took my rings off and they remain off. I know we will never reconcile and I am not going to pretend that I am taken, even though I am technically still married. The rings to me signify that I am in a committed relationship and since I am not, there is no need to advertise it.

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thank you for that response. I like your strategy.

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Seems like an individual choice. DO what feels good.

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If I was separated I would take it off. But it is up to you.

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I feel you should probably take it off because it was a symbol of your life together and you no longer life that life. Also it would be quite in timidating in the dating world.

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Yes it is no longer a symbol of how my life is now.

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The way my spouse left determined why I took my wedding band off. She had been an adultress for some time before I knew it. I was very sad, because 18 years was lost due to her actions. She was divorced in September, and remarried right after the 60 day limitation expired. I feel abandoned, betrayed, and terribly wronged. I keep the band because of its silver and gold content, not because I want to live in the past. I am looking for another woman now, because the memories of my Ex have become dim, and my resentment is almost gone. However, I would never wear a wedding band from an Ex, once she made it clear she had no plans to reconcile our differences, and re-marry me. She is history, and I am moving on.

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I finally removed my rings last Sunday. I feel somewhat like yourself betrayed, abandoned and used. I have the rings because they came from my mother and paw paw. He made statements that we would work on the marriage but he denied constantly my suspicions. He is going through a mid life crisis. (bless his heart) I don't miss all the drama that he created within our marriage. I too wasted 25 years. I am glad to hear that you are doing better and moving on with your life. Best of luck to you.

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Family heirlooms are yours forever, no matter who wears them next. Perhaps if you have a daughter, or a niece that may get married, you could gift it to them when the time comes? That way the rings stay in the family, and a family ring is a wonderful gift to a couple that is starting new.
Yes, I am moving on, but the search for another may take some time, as I am out of the dating scene, and a little leery of getting involved once again. Time will tell. Best of luck to you also!

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Separated is not divorced. If you are planning on getting divorced, most people might not wear it. If you are currently working things out, keep it on.

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can you get it off? if so get it off.

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Yes, It has dual meaning though. My mother gave me her old band when she got a smaller one. I lost her in 2008 so I guess it's even harder because of her. My parents were married 48 yrs.

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I dated a woman that didn't wear hers and after about three months, I met her husband. I thought were we are in a serious relationship and she was single. Even after she tried to say thing were over with him, I walked away to me it all had been just a lie from the start.

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wow, she could have told you something. I think it would be cheating to get involved with someone even if you are separated.

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If you are only separated and not sure if you might get back together again then continue to wear it until the legal divorce. If you are 100 % sure you do not want to save the marriage and it is finally over then get rid of the ring, sell it or whatever, a ring is a token of love if the love has gone then so should the ring go. I am also divorced and about to sell my ring. I don't want any memories of what I went through.

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I think the symbol shows you're trying to reconcile... its a good thing, in my humblest of opinions...

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I don't think we can reconcile. I just feel in my heart that i took the vows serious enough that I will conduct myself accordingly. I was told that it could work against me when we go to court. He postponed our first appearance.

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It was his choice to leave, and don't see us getting back together. I don't want to give the impression I am single either.

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well.that's good. Because You're Not! I would as thr courts Will encourage you to swell counseling, and or arbitration... Good Choices....

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It's not Right or Wrong, it's your Decision.

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