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when really i might be able to 'adopt' a wife.... from some country where they have,. a not very good life??? NOT so as to enslave them or take unfair advantage,...But as a way of finding someone who would appreciate the opportunities...I think most westerner girls,..might have high expectations and might be ...overly aspirational??...For company and lifelong loyalty,..would it work??....I mean,..if its OK for hollywood,.madonna etc....Think of it as "Westerner wants a wife"...Or am i being unrealistic/naive/desperate??...All answers considered:)
ecpc ecpc 41-45, M 20 Answers Aug 29, 2009

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No it is not selfish to be single. I think it is arrogant to think that by taking a wife, you are doing her a favor. I understand that you may be able to provide her with a better life financially, but if you don't really love her, that is all you will be offering her. I also understand that these women are aware of this, and are willing to be part of a marriage where this is understood, but I don't think that you should settle and just marry someone in this situation. Find a woman, fall in love with her, and then ask her to marry you. If this doesn't work out, and you really want a wife, go for the mail order bride. But do it for you, don't do it as a favor to the woman.

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I think you may have a problem once the woman finds out she's free. Every woman, especially those which have once been repressed, will do anything for freedom. Once you teach her that freedom is possible, she will not be kept by you either.<br />
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But if you're doing it simply to free her from oppression and you will stake no claim to her, you just may have found a lifelong companion.<br />
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That may just be the meaning of "if you love something you must set it free".

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hell adopt me

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oh my god. Just google mail-order-bride i guess, do ur bit for the underprivilaged if thats how u wanna look at it!!

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:) No mister heart, it is not selfish.

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That woulden't be a wife that would be a prostitute whoring her self out for citizenship in the US. Unless you just happined to get very lucky. Not sure what you mean by "apreciate the oportunitys" or "overly aspirational" but it sounds l ike your talking about a woman that would mary you for citizenship (a prostitute) you lost me on the overly aspirational comment.

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All the answers above could be taken into consideration, except one perhaps. I tried to understand what you are saying. But you started out with the sentence "is it selfish to be single" on to talking about "mail order Brides". That is a bit confusing in itself. Did you recently have a bad relationship with a "western female"? Is this why you are now considering going this route? Before anyone should take such an extreme measure, I think, one must truly ask yourself, Am I doing this for selfish reasons OR am I truly wishing to help out someone from another country who does not have material items as we do here in our nation. If it would be for totally selfish reasons, I would discard the idea completely. I personally know of 2 men, who went this course and both appear to be very happy; as are their wives. But perhaps you are looking in the wrong place, to find a female in your own country, that would love you for you, and not what you can provide for them materially.

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No, when marring a mail order bride you are being held responsible for her action for ten year before you can get a divorce so if your mailed in bride start to cheat on you with the neighbors, does a crime or anything that **** you off you cant do anything about it t'ill that period is ended<br />
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personally I think you need to be pretty darn stupid to marry someone you dont know just to get them out of misery cause you might be the one in misery afterwards...<br />
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what would be selfish is marryng one for the 5000$ that comes along with her... lol

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its not desperate if your not desperate.

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haha! please do not forget that you will have to live with the person. Keep in mind all the cultural differences and language differences. There are some couples who are happy but most do not work out for a long time...The girls when they come here learn quickly...and if you are not good enough after 5 years then what?...<br />
Pal...do not do it for wrong reasons!

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How does one adopt a wife?

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You can't force yourself or a woman into love by adopting a wife, it just forces upon yourself a marriage that is not based on true love. I think you are just looking to be appreciated and to have company which there are plenty of other ways to find what you truly want.

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ECPC- you are smart witty and charming..... there has to be an easier way to get a mate!

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adopt!...what you are doing is actually purchasing...<br />
women are being made into a commodity and whatever reason you give to justify this action just doesnt rest easy with me. Sounds a bit like you want an easy life with a woman with no voice.

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Why would you think that?

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