Is this ok or normal?

Husband and I sepereated, in process of divorce--DV and drug issues. I am having feelings of needing him, but not the kind where you need him in your life. The kind of feeling a need for emotional support from him. Let me explain--our son has a birth defect eveything has always been on me, I just moved with the kids to a different house, we just got official diagnosis of sarcoma(cancer) for my brother today. I am feeling a need to just have him hold me and let me cry, while he plays with my hair. Is this okay or "normal" to feel this way? It scares me because I am very vulernable right now. Let me say I am not looking for him to ride in and save the day.

Posted 1 month ago

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DreamWizard

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

Of course, that is very normal. The man was once your husband and apparently, from what you described was in the past able to comfort you when you were feeling sad and/or vulnerable.
Now that you are alone, it is only normal to want to feel the support you have always known. You will probably feel this way until you are able to move through this transition and find another partner.
My prayers are with you and your family.

Posted 1 month ago

Other 7 Answers to Is this ok or normal?

jules76	Posted Oct 8th, 2009 at 2:30AM It's very normal. For better or worse, he is familiar and we always find comfort in the familiar. Rated: +4Vote for this!
avalonleppard	Posted Oct 8th, 2009 at 2:30AM Yes perfectly normal. You are in need of a little support and your head still think that your husband is the one to give it to you, that is why you crave his attention.. It will pass in time. Rated: +3Vote for this!
Commongroundseeke r	Posted Oct 7th, 2009 at 5:23PM It's part of loosing someone they had those certain qualities that weren't so bad yes it's normal but I wouldn't ask him to come over because you don't want to lead him on. Rated: +1Vote for this!
bamela27	Posted Oct 7th, 2009 at 5:23PM I kinda know the feeling. I hated my ex-husband but still felt like I needed him. It took me awhile to get strong on my own but I leaned on my friends. It helps. Thats what were here for. Rated: +1Vote for this!
mzdivine	Posted Oct 7th, 2009 at 5:23PM My ex and I divorced 6 years ago! We are better friends now than when we were married! Rated: +1Vote for this!
SabakuNoGaara	Posted Oct 7th, 2009 at 5:31PM I wouldn't know the feeling but from what I've read here I can say it is okay AND normal to feel that way. Rated: +1Vote for this!
smteachersrule1	Posted Oct 8th, 2009 at 1:07AM no exerience with this myself, but ithink it is very normal to want someone you've always had to lean on in a time like this, best of like to your brother, my family members have dealt with cancer along with my friend when she was in middle school. Hope he does well!!!!! Rated: +1Vote for this!

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