Did you clean your pants with Windex? Because I can practically see myself in them.
That one is funny XD
Walk up to a girl/guy with cell phone
"Sorry to interrupt, I've lost my cellphone round here, can I use your to ring it?"
They say yes, your phone is in your back pocket and now you have their number
How many women have restraining orders against you?
None, only heard it. Never had the guts to try it.
You can do it! I believe in you!
"Did you fart? Cuz you just blew me away."
I think you're suffering for a lack of vitamin me.
That one is funny XD
I dropped my slice of cheese on the floor, mind picking it up?
From my dad's era: Hi chicken, wanna neck?
Wang to hold my hand while intake a walk in the park?
I would drag my balls across miles of broken glass just to hear you **** in a tin can, over the phone.
"Oh hey, I think you dropped a nametag.
Oh, wait, that's just a sugar packet."
"Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants."
"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
PersonA: Do you have any raisins?
PersonA: Well, then how about a date?
"I lost my phone number- can I have yours?"
Hey, has anyone ever told you that you look just like Paris Stilton?
Is that a magnifying glass in your pocket , Because i can see me being in your pants
Well, as your profile states that you are 16 -17, I would hazard a guess at "tarq, can you pick me up because I don't know where I am and I've taken way too much E and ketamin" Hmmm, maybe I'm just self-reflecting,
That'd still work on me?
"I wanna be your derivative so I can lay tangent to your curves."
"I wanna be your integral so I can be the area underneath your curves."
Sometimes when im home alone i put leaves on my head and pretend im a carrot....100% guaranteed success rate with this pick up line
I heard this one the other day at the gym -
Guy: So are you a personal trainer? - (Obviously not, sorry)
Girl: (Blushes looks down) no....
Guy: Maybe we can train together.....
doesn't seem so bad now that I;ve written it.....
there's one about heaven missing an angel that i can't remember for sh*t but its just lame that people still use them. it just screams desperation
You've got a nice pair.
Of eyes, that is.
So damn cheesy.
Yeah, do you poop in your panties?