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three months back i had kissed a guy & told my boyfriend about it that very day though i didnt tell him that i had initiated the kiss & had told him instead that the guy had kissed me...we were both drunk then..ever since then there have been trust issues, so much so that my bf told me that he would never like me hanging out at stranger's place & boozing and i had never done anything like this in my life before so i felt terrible for hurting him & agreed to do anything to please him.but 2 days back we were in a bar & i happened to tell him the whole truth that it was actually me who kissed the guy & he rushed out of the bar n he was drunk..i chased him and he slapped thrice n kept calling me a **** n mf..i hit him back later..my friends feel he is trying to control my life...yet when he started apologizing n crying uncontrollably i couldnt find the heart to leave him.but did i make a mistake? how can i walk away if he is crying like crazy? but now i feel i cant anymore take permission from him about whom to hang out with..is he likely to do this again?
Nishitaa Nishitaa 22-25, F 85 Answers May 8, 2012

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Yes. Leave him. Now.

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Everyone thinks their situation is "different" or "an exception" but it's not. Don't waste your time trying to mend something that could take a lifetime to fix. It's time to go.

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He shouldent be hitting you but in this case im not surprised he did. I don't think he wants to control your life I think he wants a woman that he can trust. You should stay away from him probably as much for his sake as anything.

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fcuk all the answers here.<br />
HERE IS THE SPREADSHEET.<br />
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You are at fault.<br />
You call him bf, coz you think he is part of your life. He is part of your life means he can take decisions on his part. <br />
And still you tell him to not interfere in your life? <br />
Damn, he cried and appologized even when he wasn't at fault. Anyone would had reacted that way. You should had not lied about it in the first place.<br />
HE DIDN'T SLAP YOU BECAUSE YOU KISSED ANOTHER GUY, he did because you lied to him.<br />
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you should break up with him, coz you damn don't deserve him.

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He should of broke her arm! :-P

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Oh well if that's the cost of lying then I'm sure you are the most honest person on the planet ! N ofcourse you will side him, all male chauvinistic pigs do so don't preach

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your telling me. Calling me chauvinistic ? Please tell me, did you even say sorry to him? About lying or the slap.
Now don't tell me that you're so dumb that you think your lie was forgivable. What did you expect , he will give you a hug and say," Aw.. your so honest. I am moved. Keep telling me about all the boys you screw all day."

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lol why dont u and him make a group called the losers gang n parade all over the city n preach abt how right it is to hit women. lol u r right i shd have broken up which i did! i dont need ******* like u telling me tht iam wrong! lol coz im not, n guess wht yeah i wish i cld tell him all the guys i screwed, but the poor thing would have fumed up into vapors with jealousy ! so go on sympathize with him! he wasnt a catch anyhow! glad to leave him

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You both suck, but still; he had no right to hit you. No question, leave him.

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Leave him. <br />
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If he is willing to hit you when drunk, he will eventual hit you when he is sober, and his aim will be allot better. <br />
He is only crying because he is selfish. <br />
His concern is about how your leaving him will affect him. Not, how any of this affects you.<br />
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If you are feeling remorseful for foolishly initiating a kiss, then GOOD you will think twice about betraying the next man you love. <br />
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But that is NO REASON give up control over your life. <br />
He will allays use it against you praying on your guilt so he can control you. <br />
<br />
GET OUT NOW.

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First off if he hit you that means he no longer has respect for you, it will only get worse. Second you got what you deserved. You dont keep rubbing it in on what you did and when he tried to walk away and you followed him.

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if you think i deserve getting hit for a five minute kiss which i told him about myself coz i was honest enough, then you got to be insane i guess

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You are seriously looking for some support for kissing another guy lol..don't worry you will find more support here than anywhere else

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5 minutes?? to tell him that isnt being honest , its more like rubbing salt into the wound. Have you ever heard the saying "dont tell everything you know"

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well the intention matters too..i wasnt telling him this to deliberately hurt him and i know discretion is an option but wasnt for me

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Sooner or later some man you are into will do that to you, you'll see then.

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Yeah will see you need not worry

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You did not deserve to be hit. He was out of line to do that, and you would be well advised to leave him. However, I also agree with redneck. Even though this is your way...to tell him...you must have had some idea of how he would take it. And, if you were telling him to clear your own conscience, the you were only thinking of yourself, and not the hurt you were causing him by your revelation.

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I told him the truth not just to clear my conscience but coz I owed him this much n earlier I didn't coz I was too afraid of losing him

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Why the hell did u tell him?? u thought he was going to say, 'thank you' and love u more? everyone of us have a certain level of jealousy and trust me he will have trust issues with you forever in his life. Every action of urs will be doubted and frowned upon. You'll be tired trying to just prove to him that you're honest. And it ain't worth it specially as we only have one life to live. You haven't done anything wrong. It was a spur of the moment thing. Every one of us has a dark little closet and you shld have one too. There are some things you take them to your grave with or if you had to share it, you have EP. Learn a lesson out of it and make sure you learn to keep your secrets to urself. Its time for you to move on. You just can't accept abuses. A slap today will grow to a punch tomorrow and a kick day-after. MOVE ON!!

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Why for the sake of the poor children did u tell ur bf? Honesty is a must in relationships, dun be naive girl. If its gonna hurt his feelings, u dun tell. U think men tells? Only if he wants you to leave him then he tells. now ur bf s hitting you. Leave him n start anew..... It cant be fixed unless he forgives u wholeeartedly. Even then......he has already hit u...he will do it again coz everytime he sees u now, the picture of u kissing another man will continuosly played in his mind. Damage has been done.....

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AIt just shows that he was so damn hurt by what u did.and he was so hurt coz he loved u and trusted u so much.obviously u loved him and thats why u have made hm your boyfriend,then why did you have to go kiss another?its your fault.And the bigger blunder is telling him about it.What do you expect him to do?celebrate with champagne?As you sow,so u reap.<br />
having said that,its better that u be silent and graciously walk away.neither of u needs to suffer

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lol wht r u a sadist? i hadnt ****** another guy, i had kissed him n even if i had ****** him, tht still doesnt give anyone the right to lay a finger on me so do something about ur distorted views..if he was so hurt he always had the choice to walk away n u tell me i shd have walked away with 'dignity' after being hit! well i hit back n guess wht i dnt regret the kiss anymore...tht loser deserved to be cheated upon for he had gotten rough with me on several occasions before i 'cheated' on him! lol!

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dump him

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Dump the loser.

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why is he a loser ?

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your in an unhealthy relationship, and it's getting worse. get out now. and take RPV suggestion and call the police. If you don't leave now you may not feel you have the ablity to later on.

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Smash his face in when he's asleep.. and leave ...grrrrr jus leave

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Lies built on lies make a bad relationship. The fact you lied to your boyfriend by initiating the kiss (meaning to say you like this other person, and didn't tell your boyfriend before making a move about it)... I say get out of that relationship with the bf who is abusing you. No one deserves that. Walk away with dignity still intact, not just a shell of who you were when you become a doormat over-apologising so as not to anger your partner.<br />
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Good luck x

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Junk him this moment and tell his friends what he did to you ...maybe your close associates girls too.. let him regret for his deeds .. ..<br />
Had you been stronger , you should have slapped him back in reply.<br />
Best is to forget he exited ,move on to greener boys and those who respect your womanhood ,not take you for granted as his slave and someone to rule over .

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I did slap him back

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Evolve to know what's best for yourself

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Only you can answer this question...only you and him know the love you share for each other...it's your journey and life lessons :)

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He will do this again. Leave and do not go back. No matter what you do, you do not deserve to be hit. This goes in a cycle and the only way to do stop this is to sever all ties. This will just get worse. Do not run to another man. Take some time time to figure out yourself before starting another relationship. I know drinking is fun but a bar is NOT the place to find a good person. Leave and do not go back.

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I think he will do it again. You sound submissive towards him, and once he has the idea in his head that you'll accept that treatment after careful manipulation, he'll keep taking advantage of you. I think that you should get out now, you'd be better off. With all love and luck xx

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Keep ur left up and move around

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lol

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