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He is almost two years older than me and all he talks about is having s e x. Last week we were at his house his mom was working and we were alone and he was saying that he wants to do it now and I tried to say it's not a good idea but he kept pressuring and then I just said that okay let's do it then. We kissed and he took my shirt off and then I just freaked out and told him I didn't want to (I know it's a real ***** move). He got really mad and slapped me. He apologized later with a message. I kind of understand that he was frustrated because first I was like okay (even though i wasn't comfortable with it) and then I was like no i changed my mind! But still if he truly cared about me wouldn't he stop pressuring me?
Vanessastar00 Vanessastar00 13-15, F 29 Answers Jun 23 in Dating & Relationships

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You should only go ahead with that if it's something you really want to do. Obviously this isn't the case. He has no right to push you into doing something you do not want to do. He sounds like a really selfish person. All he cares about is his own desire. Also, physical abuse is never alright. Besides not giving into his demands, I would break the whole thing off if I were you. This is obviously not a healthy relationship.

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Okay maybe you're right

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Perfect advice

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HE IS RIGHT!!! LISTEN TO THIS MAN.

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Okay I will

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OMG: he slapped you; Do not SLEEP with him! EVER!!!!!!!!!!!! Get rid of him. He will do it again.

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Excellent advice!!

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NO means NO. Don't do it.

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And get rid of him!! He's an abusive jerk!

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This guy is a jerk. You're not even old enough to be having sex for a start. Tell him where to go, you don't need him.

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There are three basic things in a relationship:<br />
1-Don't do something that you don't want<br />
2-Don't change who you are<br />
3-Don't let yourself be abused<br />
If he tries to make you do one of those things tell him that if he doesn't stop you will leave him, if someone don't like you for who you are they don't deserve to be with you.

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No means no. Even if your fully naked and say no it means no. Take your time and only when your ready say maybe. If he slapped you dump him violence of this sort is wrong. Your right he should not pressurise you.

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Once he hits you, for any reason, you need to get the hell away from him. He was this close to raping you if he got that angry and out of control because you said no, which by the way, was VERY mature. Maintain your self respect and do not let him manipulate you into s3x. He WILL hit you again and again if you stay

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I don't know.... I don't know how to handle this :(

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Run. If he slapped you because you wouldn't have sex with him, he's not a nice guy and odds are, it's going to get worse. The only person who can tell you when it's the right time to have sex is YOU. Don't apologize for not being ready. That is a big decision and shouldn't be taken lightly. <br />
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My advice is to run away.

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I'll think about this. Thank you!

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No problem.

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The question you should ask yourself is that would you like to be with a person who abuses you physically because you hesitated to have sex with him? Be smart. Don't be with someone who physically harms you. It will only get worse in the future.

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you have plenty of time for sex. don't let this idiot rush you into something you don't want to do. He's a guy who wants to boast about having sex with his friends.

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He sounds a little hypersexual...and if he slapped you, that's called abuse. Neither are good for you. Wouldn't you rather wait to give yourself to another person intimately until you have confidence and know what you really want in another person, than to settle for this guy? There isn't anything wrong with waiting to have sex. There isn't a race to do as much as you can as fast as you can. Some things you should save so you have something to look forward to and hopefully a better approach.

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I would say your a little young for the responsibilities needed for someone that is sexually active. Make sure your ready before you proceed. It is very frustrating for a teenager that is turned on and expects sex to be stopped. Some get angry and violent but it doesn't make it right. I

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I think you shouldn't want to be with someone that gets violent. find someone closer to your own age. In a lot of places it is statutory rape to have sex with someone that is more than two years older than you. even when you are both underage. If/when you do use double birth control.

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I know I was being a b*tch for stopping it.

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You have to what you feel is right. Your first time will probably be award but you should want to do it.

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It's your body and your first time. He was a b*stard for hitting you. That's NOT love.

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Nope, you weren't. It's OK not to be ready. That doesn't make you a b*tch. Honest.

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He doesn't love you if he pushes for sex. Love never requires something from the one love is given.

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He's too old for you. You're too young to be having sex anyway, but even if you weren't, someone who would hit you because you weren't ready could conceivably force you. He's being abusive. Get away from him ASAP.

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A) Not a ****** move if you decided you're not comfortable with it. You're very young and this is a big step / decision. <br />
B) No one should pressure you into this. You got it right - if he truly cared about you he wouldn't pressure you.<br />
C) The fact that he got mad and slapped you is a HUGE red flag. Combine that with him pressuring you and I'd drop his sorry ***.

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Tell him that if he loves you he will wait until you are ready. If he keeps yammering about it afterward, assume he doesn't really love you for the right reasons

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Tell him no.. you are too young for that. He could wait. If he is too much in a hurry you could get a better bf!

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How dare he slap you! Do you really want to be with someone who is going to continually whine until you do what he wants and slap you if you don't? That's terrible. Whatever else you decide to do make sure you're on the pill and try not to be alone with him no matter how much you like the kissing and petting until you've decided yes or no. Talk to your Mother.

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Tell him to respect your boundaries or shove off.

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Dump this dude he's got no respect for you and you're underage as well.

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Maybe I should but I love him.

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That's a silly excuse and the oldest excuse. You are too young to be going through this, I work as a police officer and I would arrest him for Statutory rape. It's very illegal for him to be with you and all you're doing is letting him win and own you.

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Might hurt to dump him, but you'll find someone better. It'll hurt a lot more to be in an abusive relationship. You've got many years ahead of you to find the right guy who deserves your love.

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Sweetie, that is NOT love.

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Okay I guess I really shouldn't stay with him...

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He doesn't love you. This is NOT loving.

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I really don't think you should. Sometimes you gotta rip off the bandaid, so to speak. It'll hurt a bit now but a lot less in the long run.

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You have your whole life a head of you hun, My partner waited nearly a year for me till I was ready and he asked me if I ever felt pressured by him. I'm sure it was hard for him but he respected me and my body. That is what you need a man to treat you like a lady.

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