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Well, it's a bit late to do anything now, seeing that he's dead. In any event, you need to remember that it wasn't your fault. You had no obligation to subjugate your life and wishes to his. It is tragic that he killed himself, but, in the end, it was his decision and his alone.

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It's not your responsibility that he chose the cowardly and selfish way to handle his problems. Obviously his intent was to make you feel guilty which has apparently worked but you don't let what he did stop you from continuing on with your life. You have to live for you and not someone else. Move on.

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Don't blame yourself. You are not responsible for his actions now and never will be. If you are having trouble grieving and moving on, you may want to see a grief counselor. They really help.

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cry and get LOTS of HUGS........it is in NO WAY your fault...sorry for your loss......get LOTS of hugs .......grief will manifest in all kinds of ways so all the feelings andthoughts you will have are valid.......except any involving you being in any way reponsible.......get LOTS OF HUGS......spend time with people who have experienced grief - they will be of tremendous support....get LOTS of HUGS.......

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I just had the same experience, he said all he needed was to talk to me, but every time I did he tried to control my life again and he kept threaten me telling me that he would kill himself if he didn't have me in his life, until I couldn't take it anymore and i refuse to talk to him, I feel selfish and is hard not to blame my self =(

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I had the same experience...all i wanted was some peace. Everytime i tried to stop talking to him he would threaten me to kill himself. Difference is...i was mean to him the night he commited suicide..so i do blame myself :'(

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Not your doing the guy was ready to snap any way or he would never have done that. Something else was wrong with him, poeple break up all the time with out killing them selves.

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You breath in, breath out and move on.....<br />
but cry,,because he loved you!

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It's your fault, ****.

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Yes, it is your fault you heartless, shallow, egotistic *****. I hope you get cancer.

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What a horrible thing to say. It is never your fault when someone takes their lives. Look back into their past. The problems were already there.

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I broke up with my boyfriend n without warnin he killed himself while we were dating he always told me he lived me more then life n wud go insane without me my friends callede screaming at me it was my failt after 3 months cuz his brother told everyone it was cuz thts wat my ex said me exs last words were "i cnt take it anymore i cnt liv without her" so ik its my fualt but dont let anyone tell u it is it doesnt feel good try to move on n dont end up wanting to b dead as well like me best wishes

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he wanted to die he had issues way before you.

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In all honesty, you were a huge factor in why he commited suicide, and now that he's gone there's nothing you can do to fix it but keep on living how you want. Don't think for one second that it isn't you're fault. Judging from how you phrased the question, you didn't care much about him in the first place and should of broke up with him sooner.

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Your a sick bastard who needs a therapist. What one does with their life is on them. You are a bully.

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The irony in your judgement of his realism is laughable. What if he had killed myself because of your cruel rebutle? funny how you call me a bully while bullying me. But I digress, if a girl commits suicide because she was raped, of course she wasn't to blame for killing herself. Just like this boy didn't kill himself without the abuse of this girl. you and I both know he didn't get to that situation without help, or the lack thereof.

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I agree. Society in general is sick. Many people blame the guy saying they're sick.... Look at their past. Wake up and realize they are abused by society and so many women. So many false allegations of rape and domestic violence, and society and court systems back up the poor woman, as she does things often just to get revenge or be spiteful. People saying it's not other people's fault are messed up and will never see the truth that others contributed to it. If someone feels they are to blame, they probably have a reason to feel that way. Both sides are at fault in that they both contributed... In reality though, our society today is condoning abuse against men in the name of protecting women, and people are taking advantage of it... So yeah, I blame those who weren't there for those that helped cause someone to feel so worthless and hopeless. My dad died as a kid to suicide. Im in my mid 30s now... My mother took us kids away from him and used the courts to do so. Now I have kids and raise them on my own... And I've seen the same thing happen where men are accused of being abusive, have restraining orders placed, removed from their homes, and more, and false accusations have no consequences.... We have to protect the woman. I call bull in many cases. I don't believe it anymore because the system is abused and no one cares. Just as much as people blame him for being selfish taking his life, I blame all of you who blame him and not accepting blame for contributing to it or doing anything about it to fix the problem society we live in where people are accused and guilty and never did anything. Maybe after you lose a parent and see the destruction and how no one accepts responsibility, maybe then you'll have a chance to see that you might be contributing.

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in actual fact there are many ways to look at this. Some say it was the fault of the man taking his own life, some say the blame lays with the rescuer being the people closest to him for not taking considerable action or seeing the red flags. Some say the blame is due to the failure of the systems and institutes that he would be regularly in contact with like for example being a doctor with long hour shifts where there is a bully culture within that institute and appropriate change in culture did not surface to protect the victim being bullied within that institute. Some will say the blame lays with the type of discourse used such as law that fails to protect someone's position amongst their peers. With such examples, acknowledging the rightful or wrong doing of a part that each layer played in a persons life such as being mentioned in the person themselves, the rescuer the system the institution or the discourse, no one person or one thing can be blamed in isolation for a loss of a persons life. Consideration and action for change of the many factors is imperative in eliminating future loss in the challenges of factors in life.

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