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avidiva avidiva 26-30, F 8 Answers Nov 4, 2012

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Some people can change, but I think its rare.

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Have you ever made a mistake? Would you make the same mistake again and again? Probably not because smart people learn from their mistakes. If he truly has changed, then you can date him again and see if he's the type of person you want to spend your life with. With that said, any type of abuse is usually the result of some sort of pattern. For example if an alcoholic keeps going to the same bar after he decides to stop drinking, chances are he will drink again because he's around booze. If a crack head hangs around with the same friends, chances are he will do crack again. To break patterns there needs to be meaningful and significant change. If the crack head were to move to the other side of the country and hang out with completely different people, he has a much better chance of changing his life. He may still go looking for crack, but that would be his own choice, and not his old friends trying to pull him back down into the gutter. If he is truly a different man, you will see very quickly if his patterns are changing. They say with Christ we are all new creatures. If you are still able to push the same buttons, and he responds the same way....he probably hasn't changed as much as he thinks he has. I am not suggesting you push his buttons.

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Sure ppl can change with any luck he grew up and changed his ways..

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Of course he can love someone. That does not make him any less of an abuser. Anyone can love. That does not make them good. Not all loves are healthy.

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He was/is mentally abusive. Why are you letting yourself think about what he's even saying? He wants you to believe this. Don't give him power by thinking twice about anything he says. It should no longer matter if he's capable of loving anyone. <br />
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He did not love you the way you deserve to be loved, that's all you need to know.

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Just because he says he's a good man now, doesn't mean that he is. He could still be pulling the same crap he did when he was with you. The abusers (in that sort of situation) ALWAYS claim to love those they abuse.

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Only himself

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