My future son in law is abusive and I need help?

Listen to Eric. This dirt big needs to be removed from your lives.

lets get one thing straight, It's a police duty to help people in those situations. If she's called them so many times, isn't it time they took further action?
The bloke should be in prison! so that he can't hurt anybody!
Just be thankful that he's your "future" son in law. because that way, your daughter has the chance to kick him out before he actually becomes your son in law.
She's also got the kids to think about, if they aren't safe. she needs to get on out of there.
go back to the police. tell them you demand something be done! why should she have her kids taken off her? abusive boyfriend doesn't mean bad mum! she's trying to protect her kids and herself by calling the police. so why hasn't he been arrested?

As for not being able to take care of the kids, if you have them removed from her home and brought to yours, check with social services about assistance with health insurance and child support from him. If she cant make an intelligent decision, at least get the kids out of there. Maybe it will open her eyes. I just got away from an @hole like that and the only thing that worked was to make myself as fat, and boring as possible. He finally left on his own. Now I have to get my body back and get a life. Kids dont need to be around that kind of situations. If he is not abusing the kids now, he probably will soon. My X kept saying to the baby "if you dont shut up I will smack you through the face" this to a 1 year old. It was a final straw. I finally told his family and they have kept him away from me for a little while.

So many times woman with children feel like it's best to stay then disruped the family.My heart goes out to her my mother put up with that for years,as a child I saw and heard things that I have never forgoton.I carried it into my own marriage.My life was screwed up and it was nothing I did it's what my dad did.Your daughter is going to need support from family and friends this tranceaction,is to big for her to do a lone.God only knows whats going through her and the childrens minds! She is caught beween a rock and a hard place.I will start praying for her and the family,My heart feels sick for her and the children.If she wants a better life she will have to stick to her guns and not look back.once she starts to end it, it will be hard at first but in the end her and her children will at least have a chance for a better future and she will start and respect herself and become the person she really wants to be.What she fears is only fear because she can't see ahead.Faith is things not yet seen but hoped for.Again I am so sorry please drop me a line and let me know how she is doing.God keep her and your children safe is my prayer.
Many Hugs,Trails

I am coming out of an abusive marriage....You have to realize, it's her decision to stay, or go....As a mom, I know if it were my daughter, I'd be all over that....but, in the end, you can't make her leave...

You can, however, tell her, that if she doesn't leave the abuse.....that you will be sure that the kids do not live in it....then contact your local child's advocate, and let them know that your grandchildren are in an abusive home, and you are worried about their safety....They will go out there, and check on them, and if they are in any danger, they will remove the kids.....This is about them....They don't have any choices, here....it's up to you, grandma....to help them, since their mom is apparently too far in the abusive cycle to think straight....

Keep your eyes and ears open....for your daughter....You call the cops, if you hear of him abusing her....If they go out there, and find evidence that something happened, they will arrest him, without anyone else having to press charges.....This guy has to learn that there will be consequences....and if your daughter doesn't have the guts to do that....you do it....He may just move on, if he knows the cat is out of the bag....Expose his abuse....it takes his power away....

Make sure you are there for your daughter....but, don't enable her. Find some resources and share them with her....print off literature on abuse....(I found many resources through the District Attorney's office in my county) Child Welfare offices will have them.

I wish you the best....I know this is scary for you, too....message me anytime, if you would like to talk....I'd be happy to help, in any way I can.

IF you do nothing about it, you will NOT live with your choice not to do something. They are your kids too.
My friend just told me that her daughter in law tied her grandson to a tree till he died. She is devastated, that she didnt do anything, because she didnt know what they were doing to the kids.
DO SOMETHING YOURSELF.

Once again...Call the police, have them stay while you grab your belongings. Have all of her items packed and ready to go. Get kids prepared to leave ASAP. Better yet..Just leave.. Get a restraining order in the process. The more time spent in the household with the abuser, the more choatic it will become for all involved.. Especially the innocent children.