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bellarosa36 bellarosa36 36-40, F 51 Answers Jun 8, 2010

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Why would you think someone like that is bipolar? A bipolar mood swing from depression to normal to manic each mood lasts for weeks or months not minutes!



As for bpd = borderline personality disorder and they don't have this within their list of symptoms either although frequent change of emotions is common.



He clearly has anger management problems or is unhappy within the relationship!

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As an individual with thousands of hours of counseling and on my way to a doctoral degree in clinical psychology, I would have to agree with the other posters that your husband does not appear to have bipolar disorder based on your brief description. While it would take several meetings with an individual and their family to analyze their behavior and apply a diagnosis. Bipolar is a serious disorder and I caution you to try and not diagnose your husband. While I understand it may be a difficult time, diagnosing an individual can be counterproductive. You may feel the need to fit his behaviors into the classic symptoms for bipolar disorder, or any disorder, and become overwhelmed or more upset learning more about the issue.



I would recommend that you personally seek therapy. Perhaps talking to a counselor alone will help you keep your spirits lifted during difficult times and you can find constructive ways to diffuse the situation if that is at all possible. To me, I feel that your description can range from an anger management issue to a controlling personality or even a really bad year/month/week. Whatever the issue is, you cannot force your husband to getting help, he has to be willing to seek it and many times it is not easy to convince someone who may be angry or controlling to get help. The best you can do is get yourself some support and learn to diffuse the situation. If things get worse and become physically dangerous, please seek help immediately from the police.



While it is impossible to diagnose someone based on a few descriptions, I hope you do not continue trying to diagnose your husband yourself. It is not as simple as it may seem (trust me, my 7+ years of schooling still do not qualify my to diagnose someone without a supervisor). It may be difficult but keep your spirits up, you never know, the situation may resolve itself.

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Bella, some people are addicted to anger. It is a symptom of anger within, sometimes the person doesn't feel alive unless they have some drama. The problem with this is, it chips away at the person living with him or her for who does not thrive on anger. Eventually, it causes that other person to feel nothing. You cannot live for decades that way and must insist he get counseling in anger management. Explain anger styles with him. Buy the book: LETTING GO OF ANGER. RONALD T POTTER-EFRON.PHD. I showed it to my husband. It helped. But I would like to see further work on this. Every day, he sucks up negative energy toward someone who has not been in his life for years...and goes on and on. It is quite weighty on the other person. Who is not the anger type.

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no I think you suffer from letting him walk all over you , you need to leave him for the week so to teach him a lesson so he'll appreciate you more.

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why dont you try doing it before him ...i meen yell ..shout ..scream then just carry on as normal ..ie happy ..see how he likes living in a relationship like that ..!

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try borderline personality disorder

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I have bipolar and I don't do this. Sounds more like an anger management issue to me.

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Um, could be, but the information you give is way to vague. He may just have a bad temper or he could just be jerk.

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Posted by Morph Jun 8th, 2010 at 5:55PM

That does not appear to be bipolar behaviour. It DOES exhibit totally unacceptable behaviour though. Whatever, HE needs therapy. It could be any number of psychological disorder.

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I think he suffers from anger issues...

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My husband is the same, always shouting even when he's asleep. Constantly seeking attention , swearing , screaming and accusing everyone of being selfish and ungrateful. Even though he is very selfish , controlling and if god forbid you try to do something nice for him he will find fault with it and scream and curse you ! Noone likes him as he always finds hurtful things to say , even his own mother doesn't want anything to do with him. It's easy to say leave him but hard to do as he has threatened to get my whole family if I did so I try to keep the peace as best as I can even though his controlling behavior has caused me to hate him . I wonder if he has bipolar too , aDD , skitzophrenia or a form of mental disease ?

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There are so many disorders out there. Its hard to figure out why people act badly. Screaming and yelling is not normal healthty behavior. Arguing all the time and causing strife is very abusive. NO peace in a home is a strain on everyone. If you can't have peace in your own home its time to evaluate everything. Will this person even consider help? Does this person realize how distructive there are to others? Are you willing to sacrafice your life for someone who could care less about how their behavior effects you. If a person is out of control and not able to control their outburst they need help. But many or most do not get help. They continue to abuse anyone that will allow themselves to be abused by them. Its a dangerous poisonous situation. No one wins. Everyone loses. Sad to say but getting away is the only thing you can do. If the person gets help good. If not you have to let go and move on. Does not mean you don't love them. It means you love yourself enough to know when enough is enough.

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I forgot everything revolves around him and his world. I haven't got the courage to leave but am now on my way out. I hope and pray he lets me go without a fight! He has real problems with anger and yelling and promises to get help! Trust me these men never ever change I have put up with his insaneness for years!

It has only gotten worse and I am at fault for everything according to him! I have lost my self worth and

feel sad a lot! I get angry back but it only makes my situation living with him much worse he will scream at the top of his lungs to prove he is right! Leave him from a woman who knows and has been there!!!

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I'm with 'shellfinder' on this one. Losing one's temper becomes a habit. It's a huge tension release for that person. It's like taking an emotional crap. Of course he feels great once he's lost his temper but it's at your expense. It's the reason that the mental health profession has such a dismal track record with abusers. They're addicted to the adrenaline release. They apologize readily and, as soon as they feel like they can get away with it, they are abusive again.



If you want to know how someone really feels about you... pay attention to how they treat you.

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I think he is so insecure with himself and has anger towards himself for things in his life that he just takes it out on you. He sounds like a manipulating jerk. Its not fair that you have to deal with his pasive aggressive personality. He obviously doesnt know how to communicate and needs anger management. has he ever raised his hands? just be careful.

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i have the same problem with my hubby too,the worse thing is the are 3 young kids envolved and physically abuse them i have to fight back for my children. A lot of people thinks he is a very nice guy but behind closed door he is completely a different person. iwanna leave him but i have nowhere to go, we are in a foreign country i have no family near me.

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No, but either he needs to work on what is really bothering him, if he directs this at you and then becomes happy after you submit to his tantrum, then I would think it is bullying.

Too much left unsaid here.

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I'll cut to the chase, I am 46 and I am still ruled by my abusively loud yelling father. He died in 2001 and I still feel a collosal amount of his anger in the back of my mind. I have been in therapy for a number of years as well as seeing a Cranio-Sacral therapist. I have ADHD, high blood pressure-it runs in my family-and I am obese-Type 2 Diabetes. I am retired and my wife says I should have NO stress in my life, and yet I still get angry for what almost always seems like no good reason. I am not Bipolar, and i have come a long way but I still have a lot of things to work out.



Now, that's just me...every case is different. My suggestion is to get therapy yourself at the very least...even if he won't get some for himself. And consider getting out.

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my vote either bpd or he needs to grow up and stop acting like a kid, he could just be abusing this power. people generally have to calm down after losing there temper, is it like a switch with him? if so, you might have a very smart and a little sick in the head man there

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yelling and shouting is not necessarily bipolar but have you spoken with him about his attitude?

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