My husband gets mad quickly and yells and sometimes calls me names and insults me, what should I do?

Bad tempers rarely get better. You could try counseling or an anger management class for him but if he is not highly motivated, then it won't work. It may not work even if he IS highly motivated. If you have been married less than a year, you could seek an annulment which is easier and less expensive than a divorce.

Changing people is a nearly impossible task, like going over Niagara Falls in a barrel alive. It does happen but very, very rarely. And since most people with tempers have learned that many people will cave in to their anger, they are motivated to keep on doing it. The question your husband will face is whether it will be easier to tame his temper or find a new wife and train her to take it. Generally, the second one is much easier for most men.

Do not waste too much time on this. If you really, really feel you must at least attempt to change this, define what level of change you could live with and how much time you are willing to wait for it to happen. You do not necessarily want to tell him what your deadline is, but have one. (If you tell him the deadline, he may act as if he is getting better right before the deadline to buy more time before he has to go out there and find a new, more submissive, woman). Don't spend endless years trying and trying to get along with him. He is a verbal bully. And he is bringing out the worst in you. The way you describe it, it is almost certainly destined to turn physical, with you on the losing end of the fight. Decide what you will do and create a deadline in your own mind. And if it doesn't work out, keep going until you find someone who is not abusive.

I would totally leave until he get's help. I used to have an angry side but I never called my wife names. I didn't EVER direct it at her.

I had an experience that woke me up. He needs to find a center. A place of calm. IF this anger progresses things could get worse. The Mountains cured me and I have felt more alive than ever. He needs something to focus on besides the horrors and the stresses of life.

Control freak?

Leave him...or show him the door, why on earth do people put up with this kind of behavior
I strongly suspect that given time his vocal bullying will turn to physical violence.
Just get out while your young enough to start again.

I am sorry for your situation...As a mother to a teenage daughter I can only tell you what I would tell her...You are so much better than that...To be in a relationship with anyone who would degrade you or try to belittle you in any way is not LOVE....The person who would do something like that is a very insecure person...I know it's tough to just walk away when it's your husband and obviously I don't know your circumstances, but I will tell you that your anger will only grow to the point of pure hatred if you don't change things now...You are so young with your entire life ahead of you, do so happily...Not depressed by an abusive husband...

I know that I would never insult or call a loved one names out of respect, that is just me...I wish you the best of luck in your situation...Listen to that gut feeling you get when this happens...What is it telling you?

First of all, you don't deserve to be yelled at like that. Tell him so and if he continues record it and play it back later so he can see how he speaks to you. On the issue of the traffic ticket, he has a right to have a say if you share finances. Not only is there an increased cost because of the ticket, it could raise your insurance rate as well. If I were involved with you and you did not take it to court, I would have separate finances from you as well. Again, your irresponsibility is no excuse for him to treat you this way, but i can see the reason for his frustration.

I lived like this until I tired of my children seeing him hit me and say nasty things to me in front of them. Leave, get a divorce before you have children. He will only get worse. They never get better. He does not deserve you. LEAVE.

I've just come out of a 4 year on/off verbally abusive relationship, and am slowly coming out of the 'fog'. My boyfriend was the loveliest, most charming, most loving man in the world - until I corrected or criticised him in any way. He would get in my face, yelling like a drill sargeant, calling me names and somehow afterwards act like nothing had happenned, and told me to get over it and 'stop being a victim'. I'm an independent confident woman with my own business, and I became a shadow of myself, always trying to please him. Trust me - he wil not change. Ask yourself this question - are you OK to live the rest of your life like this? The longer you stay the harder it is to leave, you believe its your fault. Trust me its not. Leave now!

I hope things are better for you

It doesn't get any better, believe me. I have been victim to abuse and never thought that it would happen to me but it did. It first started off with shouting, then raging, then throwing things, he would even go mad if I sat in a different room than him in the house, I was isolated from my family, it then turned to physical, but he lowered my self esteem so much that I was believing that it was my fault for everything, they are good at brain washing their victims. Please that is just the start, why would someone who loves you, behave like that to you, its not love but control

I know you don't want to believe it but you in an unhealthy abusive marriage. He has genetic and neurological disorders. He was born this way. He won't take meds. Therapy and anger management classes are a joke for this kind of person. Your choice to stay but know he will not make you happy.