My husband is avoiding me (4 days) bcuz his dog died.He blames me for his death and wants me to leave. what should I do
17 Answers to "My husband is avoiding me (4 days) bcuz his dog died.He blames me for his death and wants me to leave. what should I do"
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What did you do to the dog? There is more to this story and I want to get to the bottom of it..................
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we had no power after hurricane Isaac so I thought it was better for him outside than locked up in a house that was 82 degrees at 8 am. When I left I put him in the yard with water and food when we returned 7 hrs later he was dead. I did not think outside was bad he goes out every morning. I am truly sorry that this happened
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Find him a puppy.
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Leave, come over here I'll take care of you
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tell him youre going to live with your family / friend/s for a few days and fone you when he needs you - hes inconsolate right now and whatever you do will be wrong - give him time and ask him what ever you did would he have done the same with the dog
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I would tell him "I understand that you are grieving, and we all do it in our own way. It seems like you need some solitude and space to get through this and that is okay. What is not okay is you blaming me.
"You know that I am not to blame for your dog dying. I did my best to care for the dog, but like many other animals and people in this area, the storm and its aftereffects left it vulnerable in ways that you and I had no control over. I know this is a serious loss for you, but piling a loss of intimacy and closeness with me on top of it is only going to make things worse, and that is exactly what you are doing. You are pushing me away by treating me like this."
I'd be inclined to either go away for a few days or to spend more time engaged in things you enjoy. If his irrational behavior persists much longer, however, I would call a mental health professional. Natural disasters and the loss of a pet are both major traumas and he may need guidance in coping.Like (2)
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,,,, pack up ur **** and go,,,, duhhhhhh
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I think it's a pretty bad state of affairs really. I mean you sound sad about what happened to the dog, and it's obvious that you didn't mean anything bad to happen to him. So in that sense, you must be feeling pretty rotten anyway. Makes things so much worse that your husband is behaving this way as well.
I can only suggest that you try to ride this one out, a bit like the bad weather, and hope that things calm down a bit and it blows over. People act strangely when an animal dies. At the end of the day, the dog died and that's that isn't it? No amount of fighting will bring him back, so see what happens in the next few weeks, and reassess things after that when the emotion is less raw. Nobody ever made a good decision in a fit of anger or depression, eh?
Good luck!Like (1)
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So whats happened since this? are yall still together?
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he was kenneled because there was damage to the fence. I left him in shade and he had water and food
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maybe heat stroke
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Tell him to grow up or you'll use your new "powers" on him next!
Seriously though, this situation is tough. There are probably other unresolved issues in your relationship that have been brewing and the unfortunate death of his "best friend" was the last straw for him. Stay positive, take care of yourself, allow him space and time to grieve. During this time, think about what is important to you, what do you want, and is this relationship worth the effort? A decision doesn't need to be made today whether to stay or go (unless you are in danger). Use this time to define and communicate your boundaries with him; what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior, re-establishing mutual and respectful communication with him over this issue and others, and where your relationship stands. Best wishes to you during this difficult time. I am sorry for the loss of your beloved pet. Please allow yourself time to grieve for your dog as well.Like (1)
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Tell him you too are upset and are extremely sad about his beloved pet. Be as caring as you have ever been in your life- you need to show it in very very obvious ways. Send him flowers, a basket of all his favorite things- spend $100 dollars on this so it will be very professional and beautiful- he needs to truly know that you care and that you mean it. Tell him that you love him deeply and have for ____(how many years you have been married). Tell him you are sorry he lost his pet and you are sorry if you had any part in it. If you had any part in it, own up to it and apologize sincerely. Tell him you love him and don't want him to lose you too. Tell him you understand that he needs his space to grieve and that you respect that- and then do it. Finally tell him when he is ready to talk you will be waiting for him because you love him and want to do whatever you can to be there for him at this time. Pets mean a lot to people, as much as people. Even if you didn't feel the same attachment make him realize you understand his.
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I'm sorta still on dog side. i believe in accidents too!
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It wasn't your fault. What happened came from your intention to help the dog. How were you supposed to know it would die?
If you haven't already and you really don't want to leave, whether you mean it or not, just beg his forgiveness for it and tell him how much you wish you could take it back.
If he doesn't take that, then I guess it's time for you to go. He sounds like a real jerk, though.Like (1)
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What kind of dog was it?
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pitbull
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It sux whn men avoid us tell him to go live with his dog divorce him n do better
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leave, he sounds like an idiot to care more for the dog...
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Tell him to "get real". Which is more important to him, the dead dog....or the woman her married.
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Best Answer (Chosen by Voting):
Posted by ddandme Sep 5th, 2012 at 9:24PM
Not to hurt your feelings but **** him you should be more important than a dog..
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